The Foggy Tales of Life

Avril Lavigne

2012-02-19T12:12:00.000+08:00

It was AWESOME! No other word can supersede that particular word. I'm right now so overwhelming my adrenaline pulsated unevenly. Oh my God It's the Black Star Tour! I love Avril Lavigne sooooooooooo much! =)

Look a bit tired cos I woke up damn early!

Okay. Details from the beginning! We reached Stadium Merdeka around 700pm and I saw a pool of crowd queuing up waiting to be filing in. I've never been to a concert before, so it's a whole new experience to me. What a kampong boy I was before!

I was a bit disappointed cos the seat was far back behind, I can only see the tiny dot of people in front. Should have bought the Tune Zone area right?! But well, it's fine for me. The concert commenced at around 840pm with the Black Stat intro and What The Hell!

I love Avril's great vocal, was totally captivated and followed her to sing along. Tiny rain drop would never douse the Avril's spirit. When the concert ended, the crowd screamed 'We Want More'! Complicated was the greatest hits of hers and I love it still! Gosh! Worth it that cash!

Kids are so unpredictable nowadays. Oh my! Anyhow, Avril, you're awesome! =)

~The End~

The Wedding Diary

2012-02-13T20:57:00.018+08:00

I'm sooooooooo glad to have you all around. You all paint my dull and monotonous life with joyous and colors. Friendship exists in many ways, I love to be around with you all, It cheers me up, gives me a little perks and somehow drains away all the unhappiness. I love you all. =)

On the way back from Sunway Pyramid, it's so tiring but worth it, better than to be alone in the room with nothing but my dear lappie as company. I ordered the cheesy food which I found it was swallow-able. RM 20 wasted I guess. =P (Well, what you expect, It's Korean food wey).

Secretly shed tears for the movie, Celyn was so emotional the day watching 'The Wedding Diary'. It's touching anyway and it wet my eyes as well. Love is so sophisticated but it's all worth it after all. ='( A happy ending marked the end of the movie. I bet you all gonna love it! =)

We bought the same shoes and it cost much cheaper than I thought. Mine one the black color. Look nice isn't it? I love it so much! =) I hate leaving time. But what to do? We have to. =(

Simply a picture taken on the lonely Friday night as I was all alone in my cozy little room, emoness seeping in like water. Grr. I love 'A Thousand Years' by Christina Perri, almost addicted to it already! Cheer for the new semester, I'll do better! =) Back on track to many Events, I now regret joining so much! Can I score still? I dunno.

~The End~

The One That Got Away

2012-02-11T11:23:00.002+08:00

Yes. I'm back again. I really regret coming back so early. It's Friday and supposedly I'd be at home till Sunday but the stupid guilty mind of mine being so responsible for the event, so here I am! God Damn it! (Sorry for the swearing!)

Somehow I really love Katy's new Song 'The One that got Away'. It expresses the feeling of someone you cherish the most got away and you've just done the stupidest thing to that particular person.

Our government has finally done something right so far. The RM 200 voucher was a superb gift ever! I bought lots of novels though in the dilemma of choosing whether to buy books or album before but decided books worth more. SO here it goes, The newcomer to my collection! =)

I love the picture below so much! Taken by one of the staff in Universal Studio, which it's surprisingly professional. I start missing my holidays so badly now cos I'm all alone in my room, listening to Adele's and The One That Got Away deepens my sorrowfulness. Great!

Thanks for everything given. I miss you all so much. And I love you all. =) I miss the lovely bedroom, great mom and dad, little bros and everything there. And I miss the me during holidays. ='(

~The End~

Great MomentS

2012-02-08T23:47:00.012+08:00

It's not another sleepless night again, feeling kinda complicated right now under the seemingly moonless night (Just imagine I'm looking at the sky). I hate knowing result though it is as expected, out in the air for a few weeks, unofficially. It's sucks wey! 1 more to go. Argh! Work harder, harder and harder.

Twice a week I went Singapore, honestly I tell you all, I'm broke. I love retro feel! The long crowded street bustled with people. Chinatown and Bugis street are always alive with people cos their things are cheap!

Oh Gosh DSLR! Another Retro pic and I have to admit once again that I'm addicted to Retro! Ha. How's the feeling of owning a powerful DSLR? I bet it's great, right!

Great time ends soon and I hate that. Enjoy the time you have so that you won't regret living. It's the way you live your life. Bear in mind that you live only ONCE.

I gained weight, speaking in a more literal way. I express my freedom and free-of-stress life by eating. That's my fault, by allowing myself to digest all the edible food. Gosh!

Universal Studio is a strongly recommended place to be for a one day trip. Though the price is kind of, well scary for us but I think It's worth the price. Pay it and have fun or day, who cares?

Forgot to tell that I renewed my Identity Card and the pic looks nice! Really, I love this semester break. SO much fun I have. Let's hope for a better semester break okay? Okie Dokie I'm sleepy well. Fine, Sleep then! =) And again, SMILE!

~The End~

Say CHEESE

2012-01-28T18:44:00.010+08:00

"It meant a lot to me before, but not anymore."

When you put a little effort into something, naturally all will end well. Hey, I'm not EMO! I just realized that life ain't that easy and not everyone in your life will be your best friend forever or what the so-called soul mate. Let's smile and face the camera, Say CHEESE!

Sometimes you need to keep your expression neutral. Over-showing your emotions will never do you good. Keeping some of your emotions to yourself rather than showing it out to the public. It's a form of protection to camouflage your feelings without anyone else bothering you when you want to be alone.

Glad to have some great friends with me. I miss u all. At least when I'm down, I have someone for me to confide in, to talk to and to express my feelings. Thanks!

Admit it. I love to take pics. Smile. I miss you. And I love you. Happy 20 to my dearest friend Ah Tang! Best of luck in everything =) Really, I appreciate all of you who bring smile to my life. Again, Say CHEESE! =) Loads pics, less words. Cos a picture paints a thousand words.

~The End~

The Black Star tour!

2012-01-26T17:32:00.011+08:00

"I can be tough, I can be strong..."

2 weeks away from the scribbling on the exam papers, I'm exhausted entirely. Lack of preparation has caught me off guard and finally I've escaped from those particular dreadful days of FINALS. 'The Black Star' tour, Avril is coming, peeps!

I realized that I can be very quiet. Perhaps, who knows. It's a way to contemplate, shut myself away temporarily for the internal squabbling. I ain't feeling upset or anything. Baffled and perplexed. I meant to write lots about my life, since dunno when I've left my bloggie not updated.

Humans are weirdos. What has over is always the best moment. I miss u all. DO you know that? =( Have to improve my English for real! It's suck!

Happy Dragon Year peeps! =) May prosperity be with you always. Love ya all! Glad to be home now. I can be strong! My New Year Resolution! I will nail you down babe!

~The End!~

Let bygones be bygones

2012-01-10T12:43:00.007+08:00

"Let bygones be bygones"

Imagine myself sitting on the old rickety armchair, humming the tune that I don't even know, reading some old ancient stuff, totally at ease. I want a life with no worries! That's it. Settle down, settle down. Reality's gonna be harsh.

Don't ever judge the book by its cover. Yes! The real book I mean. Underestimate it will only bring you down, I learn it and I know it. All will be fine? I guess so. Don't find excuses to avoid the mistake you've done. I just wanna say, 'Sorry' I'm wrong.

2 more days. I'm tired of swearing and promising. Promises are meant to be broken. Pray sincerely that I'd have a much better holidays. Mentally remind myself to put more effort in study. Nice pic? ='(

Fervently wish that ALL will be fine. May God bless me. Specially I wanna thank my dear sweet KK9 gang of friends -- Qiao Fan, Lily Chia, Felicia Aub and Mabel for encouraging me! =)

~ The End~

Happy 2012

2012-01-02T09:27:00.000+08:00

3... 2.. 1.

Happy 2012, Peeps!

I couldn't wait the exam to end ya all know, sitting still for hours reading books as thick as encyclopedia while people all having holidays or whatnot! "In... Out..." I need fresh air to rejuvenate my body system, as well as my so packed mind. Well, It's 2012 and I hope this will be an awesome year for me!

Somehow I need a break in between to soothe my complications, as well as my frustrations. Come on! Supposedly I can get out and have fun. Supposedly I can enjoy to the max counting down the second to a whole new year. Luckily I still got the chance to have breakfast with a bunch of friends early in the morning, before even the dawn 'broke'! I love dim sum and I enjoy it with them! Cheese =)

This is my lovely 'Family' here. The rest of my day was so dull that I've no intention to share it to you all. STUDY - EAT - STUDY - EAT - SLEEP, that's what was I doing throughout the day! Argh... I'd join the crowds to welcome 2012 instead of staying in room!

I'll be more hardworking this year, putting more effort so that I can do well the coming semester. Great year ahead. Great day! I believe I can score well! Let's see =) *Hope my family will stay healthy as they are now* New Year, New Hopes!

~The End~

2011

2011-12-31T09:52:00.001+08:00

Time flies indeed. From the day I graduated from matriculation to the day I entered University of Malaya.

It's so hard to keep myself focus, skimming through notes but none of the words has made its way to my brain. I need time for myself, to pull the string back to its position. Sometimes It's good to sit down to think, to remember what have I been doing those days.

Bundles of thoughts. This might be one of the great year ever, spending time with friends from different states, travelling from place to place. How would my life be if I chose to stay rather than going up to the north to further my studies? I met great people.

You could never change what is meant to be. Life is like a big, messed up puzzle only you'd arrange it, accordingly, one by one. Upon completion is the full picture of your life. Be patient and you'll have a great life ahead.

Sometimes life is just as exciting as sitting on a roller coaster. Up and down. Everything is so unpredictable. Somehow I miss the ups and downs, It's the only thing that propels us forward. 2011 is going to end soon, and I've a great 2011 with you all. Thank you! =)

I believe the coming 2012 will be a great one! Cheers! =) Great Day, Great Life.

~The End~

Santa Claus

2011-12-28T00:30:00.002+08:00

Slouching myself against the chair with books obliterated the table, creating an utmost overwhelming feeling of tension.

"Santa Claus is coming to Town..." I love Christmas! =) The pure misty snowflakes falling down, a mystical feeling. I simply love it! With a big bunch of white beard cascading down his chin, a big belly and a 'Ho Ho Ho..." That's my Santa Claus. Dear Santa, may I get a day off without anything to worry? =)

Say Cheese to the camera! Escaped from the maze of books to the reality, I feel grateful to have this bunch of best friends behind! =) As far as I'd tell, you all are the best! Peace!

Phew! What an awesome meal! We enjoyed so much, taking pics =) What a memorable moment with you girls!

Tell you all something, I don't care how people look at me, I care only how I live my life! Ha... Nice quote from dunno who? Finals is coming SOON and I believe that I can score well! Who am I? =P Love the one who paints my life!

~ The End~

Publicity Member =)

2011-12-14T22:10:00.001+08:00

The great satisfaction that I've never felt before. I wonder how well I've done? Hmm... Great job all of us!

I love my Publicity Crew and I'm gonna miss you all! Thank you Pretty Jien May for picking me up as a member of publicity, leading and guiding us. Well, maybe this is who I am, the publicity member? Although lots of hardship, I still love it! I'd always remember it! Great memories with u all, my Publicity TEAM! =)

Nice suit? I'm wearing so Formal with blazer on that particular day! Meeting friends =) Intervarsity Investement Challenge 2011 is a success! Wow! Finally I can devote my time to study! Best of Luck Kai Jie! I know you can do it! Don't blindly listen to others, sometimes we have to be selfish a bit. Right?

Recently no time to update my bloggie due to lots of assignments! No matter how bad it is, I know I can do it! Because I believe I can!

~The End~

Back to December

2011-12-01T20:06:00.007+08:00

It's December, the Christmas month! 'Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas!' Often I dream that, One day, I'll have the chance to meet Santa Claus. A new beginning, the very last month of year 2011. I love 'Back To December'. =)

Finally I've done my management Individual Presentation, although not that good, It's still acceptable for me. Cheers! FAR 1 is so terrible, the so-called killer paper, Financial Accounting and Reporting 1. I need to pay extra attention to this typical course!

Gonna miss it very much! 9 days to Event day, Intervarsity Investment Challenge 2011! The End of my publicity job. It's challenging and I learn a lot, Thanks to our pretty Publicity Leader, Jien May! *Hmm...* Anyway, It is a great experience for me =)

For now and onward, I'll be truly hardworking. Don't ever get distracted by any other influences, especially who knows? I'm not free okay! Please! Not my fault that I'm busy =( Great love to my family and I really miss you all! All the best to myself!

A beautiful 1st December. =) Jiayou!

~The End~

那些年

2011-11-30T08:01:00.000+08:00

Savor down a bowl of ICE is something so refreshing and exhilarating when you're stressed. Drop all the pretense. Varsity life is somehow so packed. Some may feel suffocated under the constant consternation, whatever it is, "Let's enjoy!"

Extracted my sleeping time for that particular movie, I dare say that, 'It's worth watching!' Emo... I feel heart splitting after watching. How long has it been? I've no time to settle down and EMO due to the packed life. I know movie can be quite dramatic, but well, I love that!

"人生有很多事是徒劳无功的"

Everything will be fine. I believe that, and I know that! =) Sometimes EMO is a great thing, It makes us realize what life IS actually...

~The End~

It Ends

2011-11-20T09:19:00.006+08:00

Need not to be sad for something that's gonna end soon.

20.11.2011, such a beautiful date.

I love reading novels, but I find no time for me to settle down and read, it's somehow so pathetic. Occupying my time with lots of assignments and activities, I swear that I'll get myself some time to read! (My English is so GOSH now!)

Tata ~ This is my BUDDY! Each senior will be choosing 1 Junior as their buddy, then they will pass all the books and well, typically everything useful to their little buddy. Buddy, no need so touched la, just helped u re-celebrate your birthday only with some food! Ha

STPM will be on Mon, that is tomorrow. Wish all my friends can score well! Kai Xin, Meng An, Yu Ying, Chen Young, Yuru, Si Jing, Jau Huei, Leo, Chai Juan, Shun Ern and ... I know you all can do it! See you all in UM then! I miss SMKDPT so much!

Today is the closing dateline for IVIC 2011, do hope that the event will be very successful! =) It ends, partially. PUBLICITY Rocks! Pretty awesome memory I have! Memories never fade. =)

~The End~

Intervarsity Investment Challenge

2011-11-15T18:36:00.003+08:00

I'm kind of addicted to black n white color pic! Why is it so attractive I dunno, I just love it! =) Formal wear!

I love my publicity team. =) No regrets joining Intervarsity Investment Challenge though sometimes feeling a bit depressed but overall is manageable. SO many teams join now, I'm so glad we've hit the aim! We met Hitz FM JJ the day during our Roadshow in UITM, Shah Alam! Great Experience ever! =)

I don't really like some people here, ALOOF n ARROGANT, showing their stupid face as if they are great ppl in the world. Come on, I know you're Senior enough but please la, SO WHAT!? If you want to be respected, first you need to respect others!

It's almost there, a few more steps to climb. The registration will be close on this coming Sun, do hope that this event will be really successful. I've put all my will and effort in this event, hope it does pay off. Camp or night? It's really a hard decision. Stay Cool!

Kind of miss my brother all of sudden! *So cute* =)

~The End~

Dear Home...

2011-11-07T23:21:00.003+08:00

"It happens so often

We live our life in chains

And not knowing that we have the key"

Devotion is just another form of obsession. It's been so long since the time... Rewind itself to where it begins, all over again. When finally u feel like u have gained something at last, only u realize that u have lost everything u have to gain that particular thing. Worth?

It's been 2 days since I back home. 'I'm home!' Finally.

'How's life.' A simple sentence, not that important after all. That's how people move on, how life progresses... When someone is dead, the ashes remained will only be forgotten... Forever.

I love the smell of Home. The only love that won't decay, family love, the only refugee that soothes u. Home sweet Home. =)

Sometimes I just want to make sure that everything is okay. I'm not that confident like some others do. Hope that everything goes smoothly, will be calling Hitz FM soon, I want it to be a success, All The Best! 2 months of Varsity Life, more that just tiring can describe.

Putting too much effort into something, Intervarsity Investment Challenge 2011. Should be selfish sometimes. Human nature.

~The End~

Bleeding 'n' Love

2011-10-29T23:16:00.013+08:00

'Keep bleeding, keep keep bleeding love...'

Seriously, my purse is bleeding profusely now after a month or so of the pompous life, the pain is inevitable. Gosh! How much did I spend for the last few weeks? The amount must be very HUGE and TERRIFYING I bet.

Happy Diwali and Happy Holiday!

Have not been for the coming test, I'd be happier a lot! Burying myself in the maze of words definitely is another form of self infliction. I love hanging out with friends but hate spending! Essentially, fun is one of the important ingredients of great life, blending with a little hardship to make a perfect life. Yes. One U!

One U Complex =) Looking good? =P

I'm loving it! =) Gonna keep my bloggie short and understandable! 4 of us really had fun!

Heavy bowling 'Oh God, I can't make it! It's gonna drop!' *Self indulgence!*

Me and Zheng Yang!

Me and Kok Leong!

Me and Siok Chin!

So life is so FUN *Money*

I enjoy my life here, although it's quite tiring and busy, but well, I love my friends! Kok Leong's parents are really kind and caring *U'd treasure tot I know why...* Blink! All the best and Thanks for everything! Best friend! =) A big Smile to u! For the hospitality! Cheer up dude!

#102

~The End~

Historical Malacca

2011-10-24T08:15:00.000+08:00

What a historical place it is!

There's a lot of reasons I love Malacca, though I've been there for dunno how many times already. We reached LRT station quite some time and was moving to TBS when something shocking happened.

A friend of mine, call her anonymous, mistakenly bought a ticket to Pudu instead of TBS, going straight down from the LRT herself. What an experience! While waiting for her =)

We met a very cute boy from Canada, his parents lives in Singapore and his granddaddy in Canada. He's such a friendly old man!

A relaxed day after a busy week! I'd love to go again, such a nice place to be =)

Good luck Kai Jie! I know you can make it! Say cheese!!!

~The End~

# The 100th Post

2011-10-18T08:05:00.002+08:00

#The 100th Post

How to describe my first month of Varsity Life? Busy. The transition of life is somehow exhausting, aside from the need of rushing through assignments, the TONS of activities are mounting up to the top!

Keep it short for the 100th Post. My very first time to TimeSquare alone without any company!

Happy Birthday to my dear friend Veevee. Somehow I found it weird to celebrate your BIG day in another State but the feeling was still the same!

I specially love black and white color pic. So cool the pic here!

Hmmm. There's a lot to tell. Short of time impedes me from elaborating more. I don't care what others think about who I am, I just want to be myself! This is still my life. =) Just friends okay!

~The End~

Preferable Sense of Belonging

2011-10-03T08:23:00.000+08:00

Physically feeble without a proper meal, I miss home-cooked food. Don't ever take things for granted, my sincere advice to u all.

A little claustrophobic to be alone in the small confined room for almost 1 day, It's lucky then I haven't been driven to insanity. A bunch of activities coming right after me at the very first day when I first stepped into my Residential College, continuously clamoring on the need of them to occupy my life. Another phase of my life began so abruptly that I've an oblivious sense of knowing what should I do. Phew.! What a Life!

'One Step at A Time'... Could I find a ladder and climb, not laboriously but confidently up to the other end step by step? Restructure myself to adapt better, the road that has not taken is a little muddy and foggy, creating a false sense of alarm that prickling the inner mind of confidence. Move On.! I hope so... May God bless me. A specific fear for me, to not able to achieve the dream I've built for myself, far-fetched but achievable, I believe...

I dare say I'm not an idiotic nerd that will only obliterate myself in the piles of books! FUN, a crucial element in life, indispensable for me. This post is meant to be descriptive, so don't blame me for over-detailing!

Old Town

Brought along the heavy-like-hell Management text rather than my dear Lappie was a total mistake I made that particular day!

Me and a CUTE guy!

Mid-Valley

As a good boy, I've never been home so late before when I was at home. 1 am still watching 'Nasi Lemak"! Abduction was so-so. A little angry over the stupid taxi driver, a crappy Liar that cheated our money, kept arguing to raise our money to pay on the way back. ( he himself wrongly sent us to that place and demanded us to pay more ) Ridiculous shitty people!

Mid-Valley!

That's enough I guess cos I'll be having a presentation right after so I've to rush through my chapters before going to present in front of 100 sth people! Anyway, there's still a lot to tell! And the above title mentioned - HOME =)

Stay tuned!

~ The End~

Puzzling Hiatus

2011-09-22T23:10:00.004+08:00

It's all in a blur without enough sleep, somehow I manage to recall a few cheers and a few grand events, that -- sums up my whole Orientation week. Personally I don't feel like want to elaborate more cos IT'S not a big deal after all, guess what, school started and I met friends, assignments and events started to pile up waiting... And Blah blah blah ---- My UM new Life

I regret complaining over and over again how bored I was before for the long four months. Perseverance has faded away ever since, seeking the authentic me and the aim of my life have taken a toll on me. It needs time to heal, as what the saying goes. Is it a saying? Who cares! I'm hell dang sleepy after a few restless nights. Although I manage to stay awake in all the classes, but the packed and tiring schedule is killing me!

Thanks to the girl in the pic, I've someone to talk to. It's quite comforting looking and talking to some familiar faces, though I wasn't really that homesick. Have not been going through the pains during the KMP time, I'd not be able to manage myself well, a typical transformed me.

Learn to endure the sarcastic remarks that raining hard on you with a happy smile =) on your face. Who cares? The flame of anger over the criticizing remarks, keep it, and use it well as a weapon for revenge in a more ethical way rather than some clandestine evil plans, this will only mark you down as their equal if you do what they do. I believe I can do well with the faiths and beliefs my parents putting in me!

The #98 Post. Confounded, Puzzled, Bewildered, Confused, Perplexed. --- The sign of need-my-bed-now. Happy birthday to my daughter She Mei =)

~The End~

The Show

2011-09-01T08:48:00.003+08:00

The aroma of fresh steaming coffee permeating in the stale morning air couldn't even keep me awake for long. Screw it. I was all alone in the comfy little office the very last day of my working day, headache, fatigue. I bought a new bag, a few new outfits for the new school semester ahead, and a few novels! Somehow I had a premonition that I'll be sick very soon, perhaps right after I off. Please Don't, I'm sick of being SICK.

"There's nothing about u mean to be or mean to do. There's only something u have to be or have to do!"

Came across the song 'The Show' by Lenka. The oldies mode was tuned in right away. not really that old but not that new either. I love Lenka sweet vocal and lovely Music Video.

"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle

Life is a maze and Love is a riddle

I don't know where to go, can't do it alone

I've tried and I don't know why"

I love the idea that Life is just a maze. 'We're meant to say Goodbye.' from Kelly Clarkson's Already Gone is the best line ever. We're all going to say goodbye no matter how pathetic our life has been, how awful it is, and how lamentable it'll be.

I'm bored. Last working day! Like a boss! =P

1st September, the day when all the Hogwarts students back to their school. Well, I prefer Bobby Campo than Nicholas D'agosto. I saw the news that there's gonna be Scream 5 by Bobby Campo but I'm not sure is it true a not. Gosh I'm a little over crazy about the guy, but well, why not? Admiration has no boundaries, that's it! Perhaps my last entry before going to U, really hope to see you all soon, Good Luck to myself! =)

"Just enjoy the show ... "

~The End~

Final Destination 5

2011-08-26T11:21:00.016+08:00

I know I shouldn't have clandestinely updated my blog in my office, I've no choice but to succumb to the sudden inspiration. (Frankly, I'm not not at all inspiring, just somehow the blood pulses rapidly and blindly in my veins and arteries)

Death. Don't ever try to fool the death, never a chance you'll get out alive, unless you count the fact that soul is something alive. Final Destination 5 was awesome, and I love Nicholas D'agosto a lot , He's damned good-looking. (Well, maybe for me) I feel a little gay-ish this few days. (Nah, nth wrong to admire people, right?) As usual, all die at the end! Bobby Campo looks great also! (Final Destination 4)

Bobby Campo

Nicholas D'Agosto (Cool!)

Sunday breeze was calm and refreshing as I maneuvered my car out of the doorway , headed straight for someone who had been waiting for my arrival -- Yan! I warn you, Girls, that IF you don't dare to watch blood spurting out or intestine flying out, better keep yourself away from that movie cos it needs courage, as Yan was typically doing the 'eyes-covering' with both her hands. Gosh, what have you actually watched after all?

Let's talk about the Final Destination 5 movie. There's the premonition as usual, the main character predicts the coming death of everyone, a huge catastrophe. The bridge splits into half -- as what the precognition shows. And those who have been warned (For those who believe) will survive. The survivals, well, one by one, they die accordingly, unless someone intervenes. That's what Final Destination is all about, DO NOT CHEAT DEATH, cos you'll end up death also.

This pic is so far one of the best pic I love! =)

Togged up in our best formal suits, we walked kind of flamboyantly into our secondary school, all eyes were swirling to our directions. "Special' marked us from the very beginning and I'd never dream of wearing such 'Proper' attire into the old school. I've my whole day stretched ahead of me. Driving under the big hot sun was kind of draining my energy and I felt awfully exhausted after awhile.

I couldn't help but feel a little down when there's time I text and nobody even bothers to reply at all. The weather is ever-changing, raining and sunny, so volatile and unpredictable. A great deal of energy is what I need the most now, to deal with the avalanche of burden. I prefer the old me, the fat short guy that was somewhat more cheerful and happy than what I've been recently, less than a week or so and I'll be off to my tertiary education. I'm so lazy to update my bloggie lately, I may not be updating for long after I go to KL, I guess. Hopefully everything will be alright!

~The End~

Hiatus of Emotion

2011-08-20T17:20:00.007+08:00

"Savor every taste of Emotion in life wholeheartedly, as life, despite of the aim to survive, to live through the ordeals, is to experience every bit and piece of feeling and emotion."

Spattering icy rain patted softly against the window while I sat myself in the usual seat preserved for me in the freezing office. The conflicting emotions flitted across my face was somehow bizarre even to me. Guess again? Yes, I do love my current job a little, perhaps the unlimited freedom given. I don't like to smile when there's no reason to, except under some special circumstances, out of politeness I mean, but I won't have my face plaster with the curve of smile when I don't want to. It's just somewhat forceful and irritating. No reason to keep myself smile while looking at mournful or irritating faces. So stop asking me why I look so gloomy always or why I always purse in a particular contorted nasty way to show I'm not happy, BECAUSE, there isn't anything for me to smile! Get it?

There's only one great news to keep my disarray complications at bay, proffering me comforts a little for a while. Gosh! I really need a lot of effort now to be able to write something BETTER, my dear friends please don't always throw those flattering compliments at me, cos I won't be putting much effort if I were given constant flattery. I'm not that good after all, need to be the best!

Let's be honest to ourselves like angry bird, don't care about how people feel or think, just be ourselves! Don't laugh If you don't want to! I wish for a hiatus of Emotion, let go and be myself.

Pardon me for swearing rudely here, "FUCK"! Our Government has finally got my nerve this time! The vehement anger had mounted up vigorously like the boiling water in the kettle, however a nudge in my stomach suggested me to stay still, tugging every sense of rationality to keep myself from barking madly. (I wouldn't do that either, just I'm really angry still!) It's kind of irksome and irritated, ruining my mood entirely! Expecting the outing tomorrow can actually lighten me up a little. What THE hell!

~The End~

The Forgotten Lullaby

2011-08-11T21:26:00.005+08:00

Keep It short cos there's nothing interesting in my life nowadays unless u consider that working on the same thing is actually fun. ( Well, not really short after all! ) =(

Slightly overwhelmed by the fact that I've finally made up my mind upon the scholarship matter after the gloomy rainy day, now a worry-free look dominating most of my expression. A prefect forget-me-no blue sky looks even prettier than usual after forging through the head-splitting dilemma, thanks to all my dear friends that participated in advising me and kindly contributing their ideas. Well, I've resolved to not taking the Scholarship after all as 6 years really a little too much for me to bear! PEACE =)

Mr. Complicated was all subdued an emotional the other day, quite the contrary to the person I know, yet I couldn't be much better than him. Mr. Complicated Cheer Up If you're reading this! I felt awful at first and I know perfectly well how you feel right now, anyway It's life we're talking about, a twist in here and there is inevitable. Sophisticated! =(

It's torturing to have myself sat quietly for hours without doing much thing in the office. A spasm of guilt crept consciously up my mind as the words of encouragement rang in my ear, "DO anything as you wish!", well, I get paid without doing anything! Writing seemingly a far-fetched idea for me as my brain has long since malfunctioned. Squirming in my seat for some suffocating moment, I reduced to reading at last, and I've been reading ever since! Well today, I seem to be able to write =)

Medical Check-up result! Gosh! =( Anyway! Congrats my Dear friends, A Level result out and I'm very proud of my friends. I guess I'm gaining fat, cos my mom and dad said so, well, LOOK clearly, have I? Hopefully no! Gosh! Ha That's the random pic I took during my working time!

Right now I feel good listening to Avril's Goodbye, precisely a soothing album to me, I need the sweet lullaby! Do you ever feel like something missing out in your life, some piece of forgotten melodies that your mom will hum softly to lullaby you to sleep? I miss those melodies...

~The End~

Obsession or Admiration?

2011-08-02T21:32:00.001+08:00

Pathetically wheezing out a few words when people talked to me as the heavy feeling shadowed me once again, a little suffocated, barely audible to the human ears. Nonetheless how happy we are, how sad and disappointed we are, we still die, and decay into dust that will not be remembered. We'd always be doing the same thing nevertheless how hard we try to make our life more interesting.

Oh my dear Lord! One pretty blond girl and good-looking young guys sat behind me, from FRANCE! ( Don't ask me how I know it! ) I feel a surge of adrenaline. Greedily eyeing the foreigners, they shouldn't have done that so obviously. Gosh! Politely casting a few glances is enough, just like me! =p

Great thing to do wandering around the bookstore, which many would never set foot in there as happily as I am. I'll be glad to call it a day! Got myself 3 books of Harry Potter for collection- The Prisoner of Azkaban, The Goblet of Fire and The Order of Phoenix. I was all teary re-watching Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows, the epic conclusion for the seven wonderful years in Hogwarts the Witchcraft and Wizardry. I want 2 more books to complete my collection of Harry Potter, the original version, so I beg anyone reading this, please help me out to hunt down the 2 books! Your help is very much appreciated! It isn't obsession, admiration could be the word.=)

My hand was half-paralyzed though movable after losing a needle-full of blood for the medical check up. Ouch! The needle looked terrified enough even before its sharp end pierced my tender skin and took my blood. Grateful that It took only a moment, the fear rose within me with a lump in my throat as I've always been afraid of needles. Shutting my eyes tightly as if it helped to minimize the pain (It's not that painful physically, just psychologically), the anesthesia injected did nothing to ease the pain, for me. I felt a little light-headed back to work the afternoon.

Presumably I ought to have done something worthwhile during this long 4 months, liberty doesn't help much in achieving something, as I was only dawdling on some inconsequential thinking, dwelling on those mundane stuff and dealing with my own internal feelings. From today onwards till the end of August, before the beginning of my new life, I promise myself to put much more effort into anything that might be useful for me in the future, learning and etc. The Story Of Us? SMILE =)

I love the song Price Tag quite a lot, as It reflects our life truthfully! Forget about the Price Tag and Make the world dance! What for paining yourself just to get money? We won't be able to bring it after death. Meaningful lyrics. Listen ya! Is it my blog too long? Nice to read? Ha Who cares! =p

~The End~

10 years

2011-07-24T21:00:00.004+08:00

That's what I was typically trying to do, trying hard to make the sluggish yawn slightly imperceptible while doing some monotonous filing and typing job, well surely with the rainy icy day, I was practically in the sleepy mood, and THIS subsequently pulling down my usual perkiness. Moodiness set in, as usual.

The flame of anticipation is quickly doused by the complicated form fillings whenever I feel the excitement within me roaring and howling exuberantly. I haven't yet gotten rid of the awful sickening feeling of sadness, nor did I feel good enough for the news delivered days ago, not by owl certainly but post. Bombarded by the maelstrom of emotions, the thought of having a break is thrilling and exciting. Hell, I'm having a break now!

Rereading the book of Harry Potter I felt tears rolling, gleaming and glistening.

Well, no more platform nine and three quarters, Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Muggles, and Lord Voldemort other than Harry, Ron and Hermione. A stab of pain. It's always been a part of my life, a well-known magical fantasy life. =(

My friend asked me, out of curiosity, I guess, Would I be crying when I write my blog. Hmm... Perhaps, honestly, sometimes, I will. Would u cry reading the above sentence? Maybe this is why I feel sad always. We're pathetic. Life revolves around sleep, eat, work and study. How dull is that. I just want my life to be a little more meaningful.

Feeling devastated, I'm not acting all sad and subdued, people might think that I'm insane and over-reacted crying over for the end of a book. But Let's think, How'd our life be 10 years later? Working, Working and WORKING. We're born, we grow, then we leave and we'll die. Life cycle, inevitable and unavoidable. How predictable? Pathetic.

A Look Back- For 10 years have been over.

~The End~

Harry Potter, Part of my Life =)

2011-07-19T14:40:00.003+08:00

Yes, I'm back writing again. Devastatingly sad, I'm not, perhaps for now I am.

"Everything has to end anyhow, Regardless how majestic It begins, It still ends." I love this, quoted by ME =) Well, the end of Harry Potter, I feel real sad and down! See how young they were before.

A buzz of excitement aroused among almost all the Facebookers, creating quite a commotion around 1100am before the result was out. Well, Face IT! I told myself sternly, trying to ease my anxiety, looking as matter-of-fact as always but the truth was, my heart pounding rapidly every single second, sweat spilling down and pooling around me, suffocating even gasping for air. (Well It's exaggerated I know). I asked my bff to check for me and well after a few seconds, though that very few seconds every sense of mine was numbed. 'You've been offered a place in UM ME02. Perplexed, I tried to check via Web cos It's confirmed that I'd be in UM for the next 4 years, I feel much more better by then. UM Accountancy. =)

I'd have been very overwhelming, have it not been the end of Harry Potter. What the heck am I doing to be so down and emotional all of sudden? But the fact is still overwhelming. The lack of concern of my friends was quickly forgotten for awhile. Basically I need every strength of mine preserved for the future. Yes That's it! But I'm a little worried now, about how I might be for the life ahead.

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows marks the end of Harry Potter. I'm SAD as above-mentioned, not for the trivial friend matter, that's stupid. I'm SAD cos Harry Potter has finally come to its end. "Neither will live while the other survives." I was on the brink of tears watching the movie, remembering back how I come to love the books, then the movies, the characters. 10 years. It's my life! Seriously, It's been a part of me ever since, the pain of losing it, Oh gosh, I'm going to cry! =( Thinking of how sad It is to leave your family, this is how I feel now. I bet J.K Rowling feels the same too, devoting her whole life for the books. Tell you what, I love Emma Watson. And I'd buy every book and be reading it all over again! =)

Determination. I want to be like J.K Rowling! SO I must improve my English first. To be able to write like she does needs lots of efforts and I'm gonna do my best! For your info, although my main course is Accountancy, but I'll be working hard on my Eng too! I believe that I can make it! =)

Am I being too Emotional to have myself loss in the sea of frustrations and sadness, Well, no more platform nine and three quarters, Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Muggles, and Lord Voldemort other than Harry, Ron and Hermione. A stab of pain. It's always been a part of my life, a well-known magical fantasy life. =(

~The End~

I miss...

2011-07-13T00:40:00.002+08:00

A good song to share first before I begin my post.

'Neither can live while the other survives.' It's a prominent and well-known Prophecy in Harry Potter, as I guess all Harry Potter fans'll know. Strong vehement feeling about the books, the movies, the characters, and anything related. 10 years. The tight scrutiny of people on anything bad is sickening, everything opposes the right would be wrong. In fact, that's the reason why people r all masquerading, pretending to be kind and good, but what beneath the ugly mask is the stinking, ugly and pathetic coward. No offence.

When I need someone, there's someone. I feel good to have that someone, thank you Lao Yan! =) 2 more days result will be out and we'll all know where the hell we'll be going. Praying silently and whole-heartedly. Dumping all the turbulent emotions out of my mind for awhile just to pray feverishly for the coming Friday. Stress-induced turbulence? To be honest, I'm a little worried. By the way, It isn't another emo blog post, just some realizations to make.

Appreciate my friends for the concern. By the way, I'm fine. I know u all won't believe me with the posts and the statuses, but well, I'm solidly fine. Vee and She Mei. I tried to do what I'm supposed to do, I dare say that. SO what? I fail I guess. But never mind that cos I won't be doing anything anymore. Cos It's just tiring, better lying down to sleep than wasting my time. Why so gloomy and heartbreaking when everything I did was in vain? Cos I cared! But now no more. There.s no one worth heartbreaking for. I love the song '寂寞寂寞就好'. Not worth crying over for something stupid.

I won't be posting anything lately my friends, for those who bother to come and read. Let's say I take a break for writing, temporarily. Maybe a week later? A month? Wound needs time to heal, as much as mental exhaustion. =) Anyway, I'm glad for the absolute finality.

Believe me or not, when I say 'I miss u', I truly mean it. SMILE =)

A3 Long Live =)

Lively Penang Trip =)

Lovely Classmate =)

My Bffs

~The End~

'Planking'

2011-07-11T15:15:00.014+08:00

Guess what? I was a little fussy and easily-agitated the whole day last Saturday, might be the sweltering whether, possibly, or else the usual turbulent emotions. The vehement anger died down a little and the mundane awful world seems prettier a lot. Insanely craving over the need of company, why should I, while people have all but forgotten my presence. The devil inside was raging for attention, outrageous for the lack of concerns and regards. Simply a HOW ARE YOU would do, or at least a HI. That's all I need.

I didn't start my post to tell you all how upset I was, the trivial inconsequential details of my current life. Well. Awesome! Rummaging my brain for some other vocabs but found none better than that. (Sort of getting worse my English nowadays).

This is me, I typically spent time wax-ing my hair to look a little spiky n punky. Chew Li and Videsh both said that I look slimmer a lot. Is it? First destination was Orchard. It's my third time out to the same place but with different gangs. And to my surprise I found all were thrilling, nonetheless how many time I've been there! =) 'Planking' is the new trend in Singapore. For me, I guess I won't try at all. Ha But hell they're cool! Daring themselves to lie face down to the earth under the flaming hot sun, with people standing around casting curious look at them. Their courage captivated me to stay and take a picture.

Next, Dhoby Ghaut, the arcade. It's great to relax and have fun. And we practically broke the game record thrice, with all our effort, seeing our name on the screen was ecstatic!

City Hall, Esplanade and Marina Bay. The irresistible beauty once again captured my heart. Night could be scary, evil, even cunning but the beauty of it is undeniably stunning! The weather was fine, the wind gently caressed us, making our sore tiring skin ease just a little. No words can describe. So just look at the pics! =)

We're finally back to our home around 1am.. Glad that we made it before 1am =) Thanks Videsh and Kumar, Thrish and Jin Pei the guide, and Kwang Yek for being able to present herself yesterday night, forsaking her sleeping time, and Videsh dad for bringing me home! =) I feel real good, exuberant and overwhelming Ha.

Yep and I need sleep now. Those stinging, piercing-my heart pain doesn't bother me anymore, cos there are nothing AT ALL. Cos they are not worth it! SMILE =)

~The End~

Shed Tears

2011-07-07T18:08:00.009+08:00

"Shed tears and move on." What an impressive and comforting line but It sounds outright cliche to me. It's typically a few words to encourage people to be brave, to pluck up their courage to face the corrupt world. How funny is that? I know people shouldn't cocoon themselves in their other-world, but sometimes we just couldn't pull ourselves out the pessimism. As IF struggling to keep those nasty idiosyncrasies away, much the same but not exactly xD. Cynicism. Oh Gosh!

I'd have started to cry again IF I were to watch The Mist again, the ending was just sad, undescribably sad. Heart pounding as the last scene replayed all over again. Die seemingly the last choice to the eternal peace, how sad could it be when all your love ones die, by your hand and you couldn't die, although u very much wanted to? Cherish the one u love. I guess that's the moral values to be learnt from the movie?

Yes. I'll be a little sophisticated, reluctant to pull myself out of the dreamy complicated state of mine. Much to my surprise I'm okay with that. And I seriously need to escape now for once to the place where I'd never again be haunted by the emotional disturbance. That's before. Congratulate my dear friend, Weng See for getting a PASS in her exam, miraculously as she stated it herself. U are tough already for me! I'm proud of U! =)

My classmate Chew Li sensed some Emo-ness from my current profile picture? Did I? Hmm... But thanks to her concern =) SO, classmate, how about this pic with weird expression? HA. My spiky porcupine hair was a pain in the ass for me cos I did it for LONG. == The below one, I so pale thanks to the lightning! After Vampire Academy, I started all over again the Vampire Diaries. What a vampire fan I am? How do they cope with their life for years? Decades? Even Centuries? Living secretly n keeping their identity clandestine! A little headache just now but I'm fine after swallowing down Panadol. I've been publishing sophisticated post for so long, But believe me, I'm not that Emo. Just. =)

Don't ever shed a single tear for those who not worth it! Lesson learnt - DO NOT ever treat people so good cos what u get in the end? nothing. Friends? That's funny cos I really don't believe that. SO don't ever use friends to be the excuse again! I'm serious! That isn't a funny joke and I promise myself won't be disappointed ANYMORE cos there's no one worth my disappointment. Drop the pretense please and I very much appreciate that. Thank u Weng See and Pek Yan so much again. I feel so much better and comforting. =)

There's nth to be sad for losing sth, when there's nth to lose, then u'd be sad. By the way I love Avril so much! I wanna buy her original album which cost 40sth!!! SMILE =)

~The End~

Hair Trimmed

2011-07-05T23:08:00.007+08:00

Why the hell everyone looking at me with that stabbing, questioning look? Did I look like a runaway or a criminal that has just admitted killing? Oh, I get it! Hmm.. Anyway, I ain't in the mood to write but something inside me was urging me to write. Pardon me for being so pessimistic again. I cut my untrimmed hair finally, no more messy and unkempt look. I sort of missing my long hair now thought I found it kind of irritated before.

A spasm of jealousy, envious notion crept in. Seriously, I need to get myself off a second. I mean, technically I'm off now, considering I'm one of the unemployed gangs. That's not what I mean. I need to rest Mentally. "They Come First" Swallowing down word by word, I really love Vampire Academy. A great inspiring book, not in the romantic way. Practically, I don't believe in irrevocable friendship, let alone the kind of will-die-for-u-no-matter-what, I'd have ended up laughing IF someone told me that. But could it ever be real? Hmm...

Kind of cynical me but look at the reality! Claustrophobically shutting myself from the outside world, I've been staying home for days ever since I stop working. I wanted to ask someone out to watch Transformer, to sing, somehow I couldn't list out a few. In retrospect, I always found people to go out with. The nostalgic feeling of old days. Time changes, people change. I want to talk to anyone pls! Just anyone! =(

I won't survive without music. It a way to relax myself. A form of entertainment to shun the realistic world. I love music. =) I feel apologetic to my little brother cos I've been treating him quite fierce recently mainly due to his learning attitude. By the way, It's my dad birthday. Wish him Happy Birthday. Done crapping. SMILE =)

~The End~

Leavin'

2011-06-30T23:20:00.005+08:00

"The ambient sunlight paints the sky orange, harnessing every strength of it for the last burst of orange hue before it drops beneath the horizon. Night sets in."

Tuesday morning I woke up with the excruciating headache in the early morning around 6am, swaying a little, I staggered all the way to toilet. The usual perkiness was gone. I rejected to take Panodol no matter how my mom persuaded me n I now realize how stupid I'm for not taking my mom's advice! 'Seriously, It's just a headache?' I thought. I wasn't so good after all, considering me in such indisposed condition with those stupid filings, I finally gave up eating for the sake of not vomiting, n I barely had appetite to eat after all. My dear colleague gave me 2 pills of panadols n I swallowed it down without hesitation. Really, I did feel better! =)

The icy cold rain came pouring down heavily in the morning, as If insinuating my leaving would be official. Quickened my steps towards the big building that loomed in front of me as always, unfathomable feeling crept inside me. Working for the very last day. I appreciate my boss so much for taking great care of me beside teaching me a great deal of things that might be useful in the future, and the one and only male colleague that treated me as his brother. ZI HERN, actually this job isn't that bored for me after all. Reluctantly handed out my bleached punch card n left, I glanced back to the building of 'URC Snack Foods', I felt a surge of sadness within me. Perhaps Life is really about leaving n dying.

Summoning all my strength to keep myself in good mood, soon I was on the way back. The next journey will begin soon, setting down the heavy feeling of mine. Ironically, truth be told, I'm indeed a weirdo. I'm 19 by the way, maybe It's one of the teenage-to-adult syndrome that I've yet to discover? Whatever It is, getting myself lost in the sea of moodiness isn't a good think so I guess I'd sometimes walk out from the darkness, heading for the light. I wasn't in the mood to write, so to whoever reading this, don't blame me for any mistakes u find or whatsoever.

I always find that dawn is impressive, dusk is pretty. Yet It's ephemeral. Night is eerily silent and long but It can be as stunning as both Dusk and Dawn. Sleep is a good idea but does sleep ever help in those depressing moments? I wonder. SMILE =)

~The End~

Vampire Craze!

2011-06-25T21:03:00.008+08:00

I was practically doing nothing at all, considering the fact that It's a pretty free day for me. Guess what? I was in a daze today, mainly due to the lack-of-sleep night again. The so-called WEB-attraction has seized me once again yet the sense of foreboding was unable to avert my attention from the WEB! Sigh... But writing does actually ease the slight discomfort of mine. It's a fine way to vent out anger, n definitely a good way to cure my psychotic breakdown a little! Sleepy or not, It's not my greatest concern now since I practically immune from sleeping. I'm FINE with that though.

Keep it short, curt and precise. A remorseful look on my face. Life is a stage of reality, I'm not the expert in Life, nor do I live long enough to experience Life, considering I just turned 19 months ago. But I'm a believer, I know that life would never play out the way u want. Okay, I'm kind of philosophic now. I hate that I never truly appreciate learning English when I was young, no more regrets now. Well. Brief short life ahead so I guess I just have to work harder, for the future sake. I know It sounds lame but It's the truth after all. =(

Mulling over my long life planning, why not enjoying my current life? A bit contradictory to what I've mentioned just now. Don't get me wrong! Ha I mean, we can't always be serious. It's tiring! I've been kind to myself lately. Reading VA is inspiring as I couldn't believe Friendship can be so strong and tough. Could I ever find myself a friend like Rose? Such faithful and loyal? Hmm. Define friend- Friends are companies that will be there with u whenever u feel down and sad, happy, confused or anything. I appreciate those who are! Thanks for the concern and everything! I especially send my regards to Yan IF U're reading this. Wong Chew Li n Goh Pohyee for being my loyal blog readers. My fellow bffs, If they ever read my blog.

My feeling? A little claustrophobic n doomed, as IF the End of the World is imminent. Like thousands of arrows raining down on me, but I feel nth, cos I'm numb, the pain is nth after all. Maybe the disappointment won't go away like pains do?

"Inner Peace" I'm still searching. Peace =)

~The End~

Inner Peace

2011-06-23T18:51:00.010+08:00

"Inner Peace" I found this deeply impressing. The overwhelming Endorphin experience or the calming tranquilizer? I prefer the latter. I must keep a mental note to at least swallow down a few pills to calm myself down. I felt upset the last week, mere trivial thing could actually pull my mood down for a whole day.

The shopping spree is lurking behind my mind, tingling every sense of mine to buy books. BOOKS! Is it offensive to but at least ONE book a week? Definitely a Nope for me! =) The list goes on. Eat! Love! Pray! would definitely be in my MUST-BUY list though I know It's all about romance. But why not? Currently reading the Vampire Academy or VA in short again. But those BOOKS r quite costy. In fact, It's heartbreaking spending lots to buy but It's worth buying! Couldn't agree more =)

Aside from the fact that I buy a lot, my life revolves around the same dull routine - Wake up, work, online, sleep. Such a robotic life. I fail to do what I've promised myself to do due to the sheer laziness, excuse upon excuse against the promise I've made. I guess the whole working thing has worn me out. Again, another excuse. How much would u pay for a plate of rice with only vege n EGG? RM2.70 I paid! Hmm N I'm getting a bit frustrated n temperamental this few weeks, dissipate a little only after reading a book or two. Sometimes I feel good to be alone, struggling to keep my face smiling is tiring. I need sth to enlighten me up!

Paying less and less attention to what I'm supposed to do. Tio Kai Jie! U shouldn't be so discouraging! Any remedies to cure me from being despair? I'm so desperate sometimes to see ppl manipulating words and sentences in a profoundly good way but I'm not. Jealousy will come set in. =( I want to be good! The past few weeks over in a blur. Disconcerting ever since, bewildered even, why I just couldn't stick to the plan? Few more tormented thoughts and I'll let insanity conquer me, better admit defeated than to die unworthily!

"St. John Smart!" I miss my uniform and my marching team before, the nostalgic feeling comes flowing back unwittingly. SMILE =)

~The End~

The Enigma

2011-06-16T22:25:00.014+08:00

Haunted constantly by the vacillation between sadness n disappointment, mentally exhausted. "I'm fine, really." Sweltering weather, hot sun right overhead, but what flowing down my cheeks wasn't sweat but tears. Oh shit! Enough of that stupid psychotic breakdown n I really need to pull myself back together before it falls into pieces again.

At least text sth back to me rather than not replying me. Sth like "Hey sorry I'm busy maybe I find u next time", curt but comforting. Annoying or irritating? Both r the same literally. I won't bother to text u all at all, IF not my dear friends. Bff? That's funny, ludicrous even.

Don't ever judge a book by its cover as appearance does cheat sometimes. Kids r the tremendous asset in the future n should be treated equally with respect n courtesy. I don't always flatter myself with words like that. No more dismay okay?

SO here again the stupid mouth of mine, I dunno what happened to my mouth! Painful like hell to me. I've devoted my time loyally but unequally to my lappie, sleep does sound good to me as always but I just couldn't get myself into bed n close my eyes like I did once before. The drifted-to-sleep habit was long gone. I look sleep-deprived!

I miss my camera. I've put it aside for months, nothing special to snap. =(

Few have time to stop by here n read. But it's okay. Emotion is enigmatic, undefinable but expressable. Growing up, first u need to live up the ordeals, that's what life is all about, considering the fact that leaving and dying r the commonest things, then we'd appreciate we live.

"People are always leaving. They fall in and out like a shadow." I love this line from the book I read. SMILE =)

It's like years before, I remember vividly that we r in the same primary school, same sec school. U're my bff indeed. Kind of miss u my dear friend. The day before we always have the chance to sit down n chit-chat but now only via message as the medium of communication. Hmm. Really I trust u a lot, as a young sis to me. Happy Birthday to u! Or Happy BORN day xD (17th June)

Oh ya, by the way u r 19. Miss Wong Lao Yan! =) Today my 'lucky' day cos I was caught red-handed reading novel during my work time, But fortunately not my Boss. Huat a!

~The End~

X-Men Prequel

2011-06-11T23:09:00.016+08:00

The trace of humanity is slowly ebbing away. Humanity VERSUS Science. Mutation n Evolution. How greatly important is the role of science in our life? Nuclear reaction, DNA, mutation. Oh my! Science is so interesting, not that dull n monotonous after all =)

The sun wasn't that bright today. The rain has come spattering down a little in the noon. Instead of staying at home, I went out with my friends to catch a movie. X-Men The First Class... I wasn't a big fan of Science n Techno YET...

It's all about the X-Men, the origins. I dunno why I was on the brink of tears at the very end of the movie, perhaps I felt sad over the humanity? Helping others not necessarily people will appreciate, It's a sad fact that those who r helped turn against u.

James McAvoy

This is the guy that teaming up few Mutants to be known as 'X-Men', the telepathic leader n the founder. The professor that we all knw. Greatly inspired by him, I started to love Sciences. actually he's quite good looking guy. Gonna love this guy xD

Lucas Till

This is Lucas Till, I guess many recognize him as well as me, he's the Miley Cyrus boy, I mean was in the movie of Hannah Montana, n he's leading another important role in this movie of X-Men (quite so). N well, my friends r super duper crazy seeing him appearing on the Screen! Kai Xin a typical western-culture lover (Hmm I guess the people there more xD). N well Evelyn sitting beside Terence was typically shouting "Oh' He's cute n good-looking" for 3 times during the movie time. Hmm, couldn't agree more.

10 out of 1o for this movie. Waiting for the coming Transformer n Harry Potter. Though Transformer Megan Fox is gone, but still I'll be watching! =) The attraction of Movies is undeniably irresistible!

I've changed a lot, my friend told me that I became quieter a lot. Perhaps I really did change. The evolution, of mine. Gonna brush up on my English during this few mths! Grr! I see nth other than determination from the reflection of the mirror! I can make IT! =)

Breaking Dawn

2011-06-09T22:15:00.009+08:00

"Tik Tok, Tik Tok... Rrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggg........"

Grr! The ticking clock again! I'd have slept for the whole day IF I'm not awakened by the faithful little ticking clock every morning. I very much wish to land an explosive atomic bomb on the clock to blast it off. Yet, thanks to its loyalty and punctuality. =(

"Yearning for sleep at night, longing to sleep more in the morning" What a weirdo indeed?! I LOVE MY LAST BLOG ENTRY =) - The ethereal Blue

Pouting. Scrunching up our faces to the camera. No more cheeses cos It's a bit lame for me. =) My little bro was holding his favorite Kung FU Panda character, which I dunno the name of it but I bet it's a tigress! ( Hell! It's that obvious pls )

The wardrobe to the lane that beyond your imagination, the lion speaks the wisdom that no man could speak, and the miniature rat holds a sword, brandishing it with perfect accuracy and bravery. I'd love my life more IF I were given a chance to live an adventurous life like Narnians.

"Shhh... Quiet down!" I've quieted down my life for how long I couldn't count. The undulating waves ceased long ago, the rain that has once spattered down the rooftop was long gone, leaving only the icy coldness behind. Short life and eager to experience more. Friends. I dunno why I sound so negative today but there must be a reason for me to behave like this. N I knew it all along, just dare not to face it. =(

Thanks to those faithful blog reader, I very much appreciate u all thought I know only a few but it's enough. =)

The ethereal blue sky isn't blue anymore in my mind, tinted by a little of the black and white. Will myself to believe but actually Yes that's the truth that I don't wanna hear. Annoying I guess me. I won't bother u all anymore, be myself and live my life. Sometimes I just need a friend to speak to, just a simple wish.

I'm waiting, waiting for the dawn to break, the breaking dawn. A new beginning...

~The End~

Ethereal Blue

2011-06-04T22:10:00.007+08:00

The ethereal clouds clustered the blue sky, a few birds flitted past the sky n an airplane flew over, piercing the unblemished sky. How long could the sky stay blue? There's no eternal glorious. Very weirdo me feeling outright frustrated. As IF the sky wouldn't be blue anymore. I love blue sky =)

"That's why I smile, It's been awhile, since everyday and everything is about this, right and now, you're turning all around, and suddenly you're all I need, the reason why I smile"

Avril's new songs are remarkably inspiring. Smile? Reason to smile. Do I? Did someone happen to make me smile? I want to smile, to laugh, to at least curve up my mouth. Tiring.

The punch card of mine was washed, bleached n dried. Could it be used again? I dunno. Hais. Why am I always that blur? Couldn't my brain at least remember sth? What the hell me looking gloomy for that? Aish! LOOK AT ME! Optimistic man!

"Hey. mind having dinner together tonight?" I'd always text my dear daughter She Mei out before. Not now. Might be blah blah blah ING but IT's a blissful thing to be, expressing sth u suppress. It's a relief. Ha Ha Ha I'm smiling =)

Everything changes albeit how hard u try not to change it. Alteration is undeniably the common thing to be. SO accept it or u'll be going insane!

Feel like I'm spamming my own bloggie! Ha Who cares? I guess maybe no one cares? LOL. Anyway Done crapping! =) Feeling good! The spamming did a good job! xD

~The End~

Reminiscence Rhapsody

2011-06-04T12:18:00.011+08:00

Predictable life isn't that fun after all, dull-cum-monotonous. Shake off the usual Emo-ness for just today cos It's an important date to be. 4th June.

Shrugging off the avalanche of emotions that comes rolling down at me. Glad that 2 of my friends turned and turning 19 this few days. Couldn't quite believe myself, for I've been living through 19 years' ordeals (Exaggerate maybe?!).

It's been 2 years leaving the uniform-wearing days' life, the history-memorizing n birthday celebrating days before. I miss my secondary school life. We celebrated one's birthday together, like a happy family, sending gift to each other, wishes n blah blah blah... Now. ?

Here comes my birthday wishes to my two of my lovely friends.

Weng See,

Hmm, U're finally 19! Believe it anot? Remembering back the old days. The classes time, we chatting whenever possible. Mrs Trumay was so angry cos me being that talkative. LOL. I'm introvert actually! It's nice to be ur friend Weng See.

I do miss you a lot, how r u? Everything's going on well there? Did the turbulences still there? Stressed life? Cool friends? Complicated adult stuff? Syllabus to be catching up? Lagging behind? Anyone dare themselves to bully u just tell me! Ha

U r indeed a good friend of mine, not the merely acquaintance I made for just temporary. Nice talking to u. Ha. Hmm anyway, just good luck to ur new life, A lawyer to be n I'm so proud of u! I can make it! Believe urself! xD SMILE =) No stress! Hehe

A big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to u! xD

P.S Today's Agung B'day also! Wakaka How proud is that?! LOL

Jau Huei,

Happy Birthday again to u. 19 years old! SO happy to see u guys still going to school, like the life before. Hmm kinda miss the old life I used to have. Though I can be graduated earlier, but It's still worth live ur life, being a Form 6 students n having fun, eating, chatting, arguing, anything. It must be fun. Hais

Anyway. It's nice to be ur friend n I'm glad I met u! =) 2nd June lucky boy!

Why always would the reminiscence evoke such strong emotion, I dunno? N I don't care.! It's a good thing at least! SMILE. LOL Is it my title correct? Who cares! Ha

~The End~

Chaos

2011-06-02T23:01:00.005+08:00

The happily-ever-after ending captures all women's heart, always. Chaos upon chaos deep down in the fragile heart, brittle and vulnerable. May I ask, does real life get all happily-ever-after as always?

Feeling unpredictably out of myself today, emotional part of me started creeping up to my mind, grazing unintentionally the inner part of my mind, triggering the unusual down feeling of mine. Sighing. What could I do to mend it? Shouldn't be happy staying at home? Back there before I was 18, life was like that normal without any interferences. Life during 18 was stressed like hell. But Life after 18?

I know smiling could be endearing, lovely yet sometimes It's just tiring. Can I be like the lovely cat above? Smile the best, no worries smile to all. Struggling to keep myself from falling into pieces, pulling myself together from the easy outburst. I tried and I fail.

How would you describe disappointment? It's a deep abyss, falling down and u won't be able to climb up, It's not slippery n steep, It's just simple too deep to climb out. Perhaps all my dreams will always just be dreams? Ha Life maybe simple but It's complicated.

Mayhem. Crying inaudibly at one corner. I just can't do it?! Why I try and I fail? Could it just because I've no talents to do that? The dream is such a far-fetched idea for me? Giving up? Hais... Enough crapping and expressing I guess. Night all. Maybe I need no one after all. Loneliness would always be the best. Friends? That's funny! I got only a few. Best friends? Ha

~The End~

Splurge anot?

2011-05-31T22:40:00.006+08:00

The tempting lure of buying should be forbidden, a sense of foreboding to splurge. Finally I'm getting paid, for the tedious month of working. I have my lunch only RM 1.50 consistently for five days a week to cut my expenses down to max! Vege and rice for my lunch, pathetic isn't it? Ha. What I gonna do with my salary? Still in deep contemplation. Strictly against money wasting.

Wanna know how much I earn? Text me pls! Shh! Ha A secret to be kept ? LOL

Simple equation in Life, gaining equals to losing, It's like 1+1 and you'll get 2, simple? Yes. There's always multi-perspectives in life, looking from this side, you'll get this and get that from the other side.

Today I texted my ex-classmate, Chew Li, chatting sth about life after matriculation. I miss her and my entire school life before, the so-called homesickness hit me like the great wave hit me squarely on my face, leaving only invisible stinging wounds and injuries. How much I hate my life before, and now how much I miss it. It's complicated. It's life cos Life = Complication.

Started my story finally. I feel good to be able to write again, though my skill of writing so so. Grammar is acceptable but my vocab has seemingly weakened a lot.I appreciate my friend's advice a lot, Poh Yee SIS for being so comforting.

"People not doing cos they don't have dream, but you've it and you'd try, albeit how people laugh and criticize you" Quoted from my friend. I believe I can, then I sure can! Is it?

Here goes my 180 bucks to buy an external hard disk as a reward for me. Could It be a splurge? I guess It's a nope! N will be treating my family a sumptuous meal few days later. Gonna have my RM 1.50 lunch non-stop! June! I'm coming! 1 more month to freedom! SMILE =)

~The End~

Perplexed?

2011-05-28T00:25:00.003+08:00

A whole new life without books =( The perplexedly martyred expression.

It's awful to have my holidays spend working, although I'd get what I deserve at the end, by casting away my dearly novels. Okay okay! Enough for the grumblings! My result slip was sent to my home yesterday and It's surprisingly overwhelming that my Eng got an A averagely! A good News for me? So to congratulate myself? Should I be spending my first salary to a few new books perhaps!? Hehe

Is it distance detrimental to a relationship, friendship for instance. Pondering. Could it be so easily ruined, so fragile n delicate? Muddled, I hate those who like faking innocent, pretending to be kind n good to u but behind there's a sharp knife well-kept to be able to have a strike on u whenever possible, hypocrite to be precise to describe them.

It's a whole new me, wondering what changes could I make for my future. Ha Finally n officially my matriculation ended a mth ago. Well, life has made a turn n I'm cuming back to this sweet home for almost a mth. Miss the life before thought I remember me grudging vehemently WHY I WOULD BE THERE when I was there. Weirdo me! Ha...

I love Avril, her new album inspires me a lot, care nothing but enjoy the life. What the hell. Sometimes we shouldn't be so restricted, life could have been fun IF u don't put much restrictions on urself. Hmm... It's true. Love my life more than ever, I'm born to live this life. SO why would I be grudging about the life before me? Why not just What the hell! Ha

Blogging. I m not so hardworking as before, updating my blog daily or weekly as my life isn't that interesting now compared to the life before. I mean, the same dull routine of working from 830am to 600pm. DO u guys want me to detail on it? LOL.

I'm so sad again cos I feel like my English has taken an abrupt landing, plummeting down to a level that I realized I've to start working on my English again. Here I come. Working has indeed exhausted me, leaving me no strength. Hais. SMILE =)

~The End~

Life

2011-05-15T00:40:00.004+08:00

Hypopituitarism.

An adorable little girl is actually 33 years old. Could u believe that?! Killing spree is lurking on the back of this very little girl mind, appearance does cheat sometimes. 'Orphan' I watched, with tremendous excitement and it's really quite hyperventilating, even hysterical perhaps? I tot it's a normal adopt-some-scary-child movie like those lame movies. But hell It's NOT! Strongly recommended!

For some reasons I've abandoned my blog for weeks. Up n down, up n down. Appropriate adjustment to my current life is a must, I'd still hear the voice of laughter reverberating, slightly incongruous to my post-Finals Life. i wanted very much to find someone to talk to, to confide in yet I've not. Friends are all too busy even to reply my messages. It's okay maybe I'm gabbing too much.

I'm gonna splurge on some novels after getting my salary! Result will be out few days after. What should I do? "Wait". It's a patient game, to wait like a cow waiting to be slaughtered. Hell Nope! It's like waiting to get a newborn baby! The unveiled truth will be revealed soon.

Life is unpredictable, unexplainable, and unfathomable. It's all about going through ordeals n growing up. Perplexed? Life is amazing. Insouciant life is ephemeral yet it's enough. We need to be contented and not taking everything for granted. Treasure time, cherish ppl.

Done crapping...

~The End~

Trio to Singapore

2011-04-30T16:10:00.016+08:00

尝试。突然有种莫名的彷徨，空虚。一个不一样的人生。

心情有点怪异得无法形容，些许的无奈伤感加不舍。

生离死别是必经之路这我懂，开心就行了！

但，朋友们，好想念你们啊！

28th April 2011, Thursday.

It's a place worth dying for. Haven't been to Singapore for nearly a year since I entered the matriculation program. Bringing along 2 of my friends together Tey and Alsen was another whole new experience to me cos I've never been out to Singapore other than the gang I have before.

Trio of us met at 10 in the morning with white-and-black attire on us. This was the very first trip for Alsen to be going to Singapore. The long queue. Around 11 we reached Kranji, taking MRT to Orchad road, the first destination!

So we're busy seeking for the Visitors center for the sake of getting more infos about the trip we r going to embark on. we outlined the path we going to take - China Town, Raffles Place.

Had our lunch in China town cos it's reputation of great food. Hmm. It's yummy and tasty seeing stall upon stall of great food in front of me as to the making decision part, we vote for the cheapest!

Decided heartbreakingly to drop the Esplanade and Promenade out of our place-to-visit list, putting the Merlion as our priority. Raffles place is another great hit of us!

First the Merlion. We queued for roughly half an hour, and at last we have the chance to meet the Merlion. The Merlion Hotel was specially designed for those who would like to spend a night with that special creature that symbolizes Singapore.

Next, Esplanade mall! Hmm. It's yet another famous place to be. We all walked around, buying ourselves ice cream to ease the sun burn. Exaggerated but the weather really quite hot there.

Met my very OLD friend Kwang Yek. She brought us to Ang Mo Kio. Had some special delicacies and then we all be gone.

The next day I brought Alsen to Cs and night sent him back home. Hmm...

I really miss my friends a lot, the days before. Seeing pics before. It's weird that we all before wish fervently that we will be back soon but now I sincerely wish that the very days before come back alive. I miss my dear friends, my life and the trip- Penang and Singapore. Indeed.

Tanjung Bungah- The best Trip

2011-04-26T14:14:00.012+08:00

23.04 - 26.04

Hmm. It's all by fate that we can meet each other, merry meet, merry part and merry meet again. The unusual hollowness creeps in and I feel oddly emo now. Perhaps time really flies? A few wonderful days soon ended.

Penang Island. Aaron's house.

Tanjung bungah is where Aaron's house located.

Really, I don't know where to begin.

Our first day we went out to the Botanical Garden with Aaron ( 元祥), Alsen, Evelyn, Pei Li, Pei Ee, Pei Ee sis, yo Heng. Hmm It's a whole new experience for me to be hanging out with another whole new gang. And yes, after that we all went Gurney Drive to have dinner. Hmm... N our day 1 ended.

It's like the first day we met, and yet now we all are going to depart for another phase of life. For, the Matriculation part has officially ended. Hmm... Guys, I'm missing you all now!

25th April

The very last day of my Trip before going back. Breakfast with Carol (咳来殴) and her mom. After that we all went to temple. We too lots of pics there and had tons of fun, It's worth going.

Ke Lok Si, I've been there before but now going out with Aaron was yet another new experience, Pei Li + Evelyn. It's fun though we weren't planned for that. It's fate I guess. And I enjoy it very much.

Toy Museum, the world largest as the toy museum. Hmm I got no comment on that, visit yourselves! I love toys and I'm so happy to see toy display! It's quite expensive but I don't care, cos I'm happy.

Sincerely, thank you Aaron for letting us to stay at your house. I very much appreciate your hospitality. Ha. Miss u all of sudden! U're a good friend indeed and I truly hope that our visit can enlighten ur life. Tot only 3 days but I feel overwhelming, It's nice to know u. Thank u very much for everything. It isn't easy to meet a good friend, so I'll cherish u all as part of my life I've spent with u guys. Memory won't be forgotten.

Why always the departure so hurt?

P.S i'm a bit emo now since I came back here maybe I feel like the black void is deepening. Maybe memory is the only everlasting thing. All the best, my dear friends... ...

~The END~

Bkt Mertajam

2011-04-22T01:07:00.012+08:00

20.04 - 23.04 2011

Have u ever been bustling here and there without proper meal from 6am to 7pm? It happened to me during my Birthday! Can you imagine that feeling?! Shouldn't I deserve a sumptuous and delightful meal, anything but packing!

Hmm... I felt outrageously tiring the very BIG day of mine and was almost bursting out of rage for some reasons. Trying calmly to regain my composure. It's hard when you're on the brink of going-to-explode condition. I left my matriculation in a haste, hurrying here and that.

Penang. First I'm gonna apologize for my rude behavior of being so moody when I first reached here cos I was really dead beat. Really I appreciate my friends very much for once again celebrating my 19 birthday! Alsen, Tjen Wei, Lian Pei, Evelyn Goh, Grace Lai and Pei Li. Hmm. Secret Recipe cakes n total 7 of THEM!

Very appreciate my dearest Bkt Mertajam friends for their hospitality. Especially Alsen Lee for him providing me place to stay, and his mom is sooo kind and generous. It's fun to hang out with them cause I've never been going out with my friends till after midnight, chitchatting about anything but studies. It's relaxed and comfortable.

It's an undeniable fact that the FOOD is so fantastic. The Food Paradise. Gaming for hours and managed to 'put' our name in the list of winner! Ha KMP! I've never done this before in my life with any of my friends for 1 hour. 7 of us to play a game, though it's hilarious, but it's fun and I won't forget you all... Dunno why I feel suddenly emo. Happy moment always the best. I hate to say Good-Bye!

Hmm. I guess that's all for Bkt Mertajam. Thank you Alsen's mom. Could my life be so relaxing like now. Hanging out with friends whole day? Ha. Maybe we should be glad to have the few days. Happy to be with you all. And love you all.

NEXT STOP - Penang Island!

Disappoinment

2011-04-18T15:45:00.009+08:00

Discombobulated, out of drowsiness? Perplexedly 2 weeks' time will be over soon and I left 2 days to pack. It's my FINALS, the very final Finals.

Never before I feel so sleepy but couldn't sleep. Never before I feel so extreme, so disappointed over something. It's not that kind of Hey-my-exam-I-only-got-90-not-95 kind of disappointment. That's nothing actually, even my exam fails I won't be sinking in pessimism for 2 days.

Congrats myself that MY ESSAY is out in School Magazine. How proud that feeling, so exuberant and overwhelming the feeling. BUT MY ESSAY with not my name printed in that Mag. It's my essay! WHY THE HELL I so CARELESS to not writing down my name on that essay of mine? And Other's name on it!!!

I learn that,

Don't ever put too much trust and belief in 1 friendship as It might turn out to be nth in return. But some trustable friends are okay.

Could I be happier IF I chose to stay as a mommy-boy instead of coming here?

Have not been choosing to come here, I would not be able to see the reality. Reality is cruel, deep down in my heart, I feel glad to come here. Thanks my MOM and DAD very much. I love you all. The tears were worth flowing. IT'S a platform of LIFE here, but what I see is not the actresses and actors pretending to be good versus bad but the REAL Life, The real human nature, unpredictable, evil and cunning.

笑

2011-04-05T08:59:00.009+08:00

看了老恩的部落各有点伤感，

觉得以前的我们是那么的开朗单纯，

笑容那么的真，

那么的不虚伪。

我说,

有时候会觉得笑是很累的事情，

不笑，

又是耍酷玩Emo。

是不是老了?

很不时就看回以前的照片，

有时候想想，

干嘛这么累去笑，

做回自己不就好了吗？

我说，

看那照片里的我们，

笑得那么的自然不做作，

以前的我们。

可能，也许，或者是

长大了，成熟了，会想了，

或是看累了虚伪的人，

所以累了，不笑了。

我说，

从前的从前，

就只是从前，

回忆永远是最美最真的。

笑？

在怎么努力的笑，

也笑不出以前的那种自然。

Thank you for being part of me!

Love you all my Old Friends!

~完~

Goodbye

2011-04-01T14:18:00.017+08:00

Self-centered. Humans are selfish, ignorant and STUPID. How blue could the sky be? It'd never be the azure blue sky. Perhaps GOD is trying to warn us the coming calamity, the coming Doomsday. The end of the World to be precise. Heavy rain created havoc again- Flooding the small area without mercy. Maybe we all are going to die soon, to the other lane, the lane that we can find peace with each others. The world without STReSss?

BYE ALL~~~

It might be my last entry here in KMP. I still remember first I came here with total reluctance, with no smile but sad expression plastered on my face. The kind of hey-ppl-don't-stare-at-me look on my face, vacuous mind and vacant look. It's been months ago - 10 May 2010.

I still remember my mom, the worried look of hers. Deep in heart she wished fervently that I won't be coming here, I know that cause I've never been leaving my sweet abode. But still I adamantly agree to come but with no enthusiasm. Here I am. 1 April 2011, typing out this entry, MOM, I came, and I did it! Thank you mom. I really love you all, my dear family.

Attending 3 JamuanS had me worn out. It's finally coming to an end- My life here.

I changed a lot I guess, PHYSICALLY obvious and mentally. But still I am who I am.

BYE everything here and I will be officially leaving here on 20 April 2011.

Thank you my LOVELY classmate ,

For U accompanying me 2 sem.

Sorry IF I offended you. Really!

To Chew Li,

It's been almost a year I same class with you, when I first came here, I didn't really dare to talk to you cause you looked fierce and scary, serious professional look! Ha

But hey man! You're not that serious as you look, you're talkative in many WAYS, a way more noisy than I thought, and you're funny, actually quite caring and kind to the others la ( I know you're smiling now, I hardly praise ppl! ha ) But I'm glad to know you, It's like destiny that we both are to be in the same class. Ha SO I enjoy the whole schooling-with-you days. Will definitely miss you! And real sorry for everything I've done, purposely or unintentionally ( LOL Sure must be unintentionally la ) xD

To A3T5,

The best class I've ever had, Miss you all guys and girls ( Only 4 guys including me == )

Sorry IF I offended you all. Miss you all xD

To all my Chinese and Indian Friends,

Miss you all for the fun, for every single memory in KMP, I'm really happy to have you all around, making my life more merry and wonderful. Especially Hema my sister, must take care yourself, don't be too kind! xD Thx everyone here I really enjoy the life here. Thx ya She Mei for being a good daughter, my Kuliah-mates A3! Daniel, My Ping Pong companion! So loyal! xD Taye, Yp, SK, Teaw! Ke Xin, Mei sis, 2 Oois, Lian Pei sis! Ha And all Johore ppl! Really happy to meet you all. Kok Leong the CUTE guy! Ha. Poh Yee, Zhi Yung my marching gang, My roommates! Kwan Shen also for always being so helpful and kind Ha

P.S I'll remember those who worth remember.

Merry meet, merry part and merry meet again! Ha

Thx my Syaufik from the very beginning being my roommate xD

我说：其实还真的有点不舍得，看看四周，已经两个学期了，十个月了，从当初的不想来，到现在的不舍，有点矛盾。

我在说：真的谢谢所有的一切，让所有的一切都留在美丽的回忆吧。。。

也在此谢谢一些一直鼓励我的朋友，没有你们真的我不懂会怎样! Really appreciate you all and I'm so glad to have you all! Thx my mom also! I love you SO much! And my dad and bros

And I wish myself Happy Birthday. Should thank my Dad and Mom, IF not for them. I won't be here!

~BYE Perlis~

Written date ~ 1 April 2011

Published Date ~ 20 April 2011

What The Hell

2011-03-18T22:26:00.009+08:00

A long gap of 2 weeks, I found my emotions stirring up and down! From the unbreakable code to the unfathomable extraterrestrial life, slowly approaching the last book of Dan Brown. And eventually nearing the end on my KMP life. Kinda restless and exhausted to be doing my assignments.

Almost, my Finals will be soon coming. Well, pity that the schedule out and 20th April is the last day of my Finals. The important day of my life! To hell with that! But I'll be staying Penang for days before going to my sweet abode, leaving the northern part of M'sia! SOON!

Recently kinda addicted to photography! Love taking pics cause It's a proof of my llife.

And yes! I love Avril's new Album! Recommend all to listen ya cause IT'S real Punk and Funky!!! xD Esp the MV of the song WHAT THE HELL!! It's awesome Ha

What infuriating me the most is that The broken stupid hell door needs my RM 250! Spoiling my mood utterly! Surely Mon I'll go find the Authority to solve this STUPID problem! May GOD bless me! All the best to my 'RENDEZVOUS' with the Lovely Authority!!!

~~ Really Miss my Family so much! Countdown now to go back! ~~

肤浅 Shallow

2011-03-02T17:31:00.002+08:00

Twas heartbreaking, Blind, to see no capabilities but the outer look, for the outer appearance could never outdo the inner beauty. Have not been the real capabilities of ours, We could never be the winner. Sad fact perhaps, yet ppl are indeed that shallow.

Racism. Unfair treatment. It's the so-called lovely society, with none to impede this from happening. Undeniable and inevitable fact to all but still, that very realistic fact saddens ppl more. Shouldn't we try not to evaluate ppl from their looks but deeply from their heart? The passion but not how they dress? 肤浅!

I'm exhausted for real, for everything. Sobbing inaudibly with the pics, I really miss the afore life. The wide grin plastered on his face beside me, young but energetic. Those who sacrifice should get more, but It's indeed ridiculous that those who did nth get everything so handy, pathetic as to be human? Life is so pathetic. Fear not to voice out.

Crash

2011-03-02T16:53:00.003+08:00

Below is the essay that I've written simply for mag. My school's mag.

Don't criticize IF it's not good cause I did that in my management class, only 1 hour given but was checked la before I posted it Hehe

CRASH

The plane shook again and all the passengers went into hysteria, screaming and shouting, breaking the silence and creating commotion on the plane. A voice crackled over the sound system, “All passengers please be seated, there will be an emergency landing within 5 minutes.” The third shake came abruptly and without warning, the plane started to plummet downwards violently. The passengers were all trying to unbuckle their seatbelts but it was in vain, as the seatbelts were locked, to their dismay. Within two minutes, a loud explosion ended thirty two passengers’ lives with only one survivor.

Vague images formed in Paul’s mind as he slowly opened up his eyes. Feeling as uncertain as ever, he saw a man standing in front of him, clipboard in hand while a plump little girl stood beside the man, a wide grin plastered onto her face. He tried hard to sit up but the injuries pained him more than ever. Instantly the fresh memories came back to him and he found himself hugging his knees, sobbing inaudibly as the incident replayed heartbreakingly in his mind again and again. The man with the white coat went out, leaving the little girl, his niece, beside Paul, soothing his turbulent emotions.

Life never felt as devastating to Paul as it was now. Humans are vulnerable when it comes to facing the painful truth. Paul blamed himself for everything, physically and mentally tormented by the grief and guilt. He lost everything he had in one terrible day. Had he not been so persistent on boarding that plane, his life would not be so pathetic now, Facing these thoughts, he drowned himself in sorrow. The profound sadness was unbearable and for a few times he tried killing himself but failed. For him, perhaps dying was the best solution to end his sorrow.

His niece was the only company for him during these hard times, the sole spiritual support for him. One day, his seven year-old niece asked him, ‘Uncle Paul, why do you always look so gloomy? Shouldn’t we be happy to have a chance to breathe the fresh air? To be able to see the vivid colors of the world? To be born into this wonderful world?’ Tears flowed down on his cheeks unintentionally. How brave his niece was, to just lose her parents and be here to comfort him to be optimistic. Finally, Paul came to realize that life could never be beyond reproach. He should be happy that he survived the macabre accident. He should live on happily for his late son and wife, for God granted him a chance to live. He should be grateful and thankful, not grieving on the incident that had already happened and could not be changed.

Why should we be sinking in the pessimism when the journey of life still so long ahead of us? Ponder over this statement and perhaps life would be happier. There is no cul-de-sac in our life, turn around and you will see the road that has not reached an end.

Flaw

2011-02-20T10:10:00.008+08:00

Flawless life seems imperfect sometimes while life couldn't be above reproach. Perfectionist often faces failures as life couldn't be that perfect as they've planned. I'm not a perfectionist but I do demand a better life, a nearing perfect life.

Seriously, I was upset that I couldn't write out an essay smoothly like I did before! Feeling deeply disappointed but am really going to work hard to achieve my dream! I want to be a Proficient English User!!! Not a Perfectionist but want to be better! xD

It's been so long since my last entry as I've been real busy for the CNY event cum Co-curriculum activities. Feeling profoundly tired and busy, gasping for the fresh air here is harder than ever. Finally I'm here updating my blog with my assignments putting aside.

This is my gang for the Chinese New Year performance. Finally the event over! I definitely will miss you guys! Piece!

February now and a few more weeks I'll be off to Johor eternally, sometimes I really did wanna go back ASAP but while thinking the life here, somehow alrdy months being here, I still will miss the life here. The dilemma I face, the problem even the ppl.

This is my dearest sweet daughter! Ha Hip hop girl?!

Bye Weng See! Happy living in Aus again!

Hope to see ya soon! xD

Chinese New Year!

2011-02-06T20:23:00.014+08:00

Always, I feel happier a lot here, perhaps the familiarity or else the ppl here. This should be and would be my last trip back here and I'll be going back tomorrow night, struggling for another 3 months and I'll get my freedom.

Here we go for my life here during Chinese New Year.

This is the ME after going to Perlis for 8 months! Any changes? Ha

2 hours journey and I reached my hometown, kinda dilapidated but warm from its appearance. Once I went inside, I was greeted by lots of compliments saying that I SLIM a lot. My grandma was hurt seeing me slim while my grandpa was the cutest! Ha Asking where's me when I just one feet away from him. Ha

JOHOR BAHRU!

Meeting entire different 3 gangs of friends today indeed tiring me out! First to go, Jusco Tebrau City meeting my old, ( I guess former more suitable since many won't be admitting they will be turning 20 soon ) friends.

Primary school gathering but with only 5 of us going? Ha but I feel real happy to meet them though only 5.

Next. Going Kalok and Grace house. We chatted and ate a lot. You won't be hungry during this festival and I'm damned FULL now ! Ha We took a lot of pics. Kai Xin and Kalok so funny and a lot of funny pics of them being taken !

YO! Nice pic right! Haha Serious le! xD

Gangster style Ha

And last I met my super duper good friends!

Vivien, Tang, Celyn and Weng See! So sweet they all. Taking a lot of pictures and A Tang treated me drink, Starbucks! Dark macho! OMG! It tastes good! Ha

They still the same, not much changes. Ha I really miss you guys a lot. We still that noisy, that talkative, that close. No matter what, we are still the best friends ever! Miss you all! Love you all!

Me and Veevee. xD Sweet?! Ha

This is me and Celyn. Pretty girl ya! Ha Celyn I know U're smiling right now!

This is me and a Tang! Ha Pretty a lot? xD

This is me and Weng See My Super close friend

Currently an Australian Haha

She now so pretty already right? Ha

Say Cheese! Ha

I never feel so happy before. Going to far away for studies always end up good, I now realize family and old friends are the best gift I got from God. Thanks! I will cherish them!

New Year Eve

2011-02-02T12:08:00.007+08:00

Even the best player would probably be caught off guard while playing their best game, bursting their bubbles to be the best among all. Let bygones be bygones, learning from the mistakes we did. Happy New Year Eve to all!

The heavy downpour seemingly has come to an end though the Sun is still hiding behind the thin veil of clouds, shyly avoids Himself to be presented to mankind. but thankfully, the rain has finally stopped, Mercifully. Looking for the Rain God? The flooded area has already on the way back to normal by now I guess, with the Sun shines proudly above us ( Hmm Some area I guess but here all windy ) =]

Flight Grrr!!! So painful my ears yesterday when on flight due to the stupid pressure thing, my eardrums seemed like was going to burst real soon! I was just one step away from deaf I guess. But I love plane cause It's real fast and only took 1 hour to be back here from the northest part of Malaysia to the southest part!

But the journey was far more tiring then bus, I was utterly exhausted and when the clock struck 10pm I've already been sleepy like hell. The journey had worn me out yet the journey had enlightened me up! Ha

And lastly!

Happy Chinese New Year EVE to all my friends, together we all celebrate this event. Enjoy the reunion Dinner we'll all be having tonight

P. S I just wrote that the rain stops and now the heavy downpour came LOL

Holiday

2011-01-23T15:32:00.008+08:00

Dragging an unusually enormous but light luggage across the bus station with my mom and two little brothers followed faithfully behind. Waving reluctantly before the bus set off with a surge of sadness, yet no matter how reluctant I am to leave them behind, still I have to.

The usual stinging feeling was back. Humans are the weirdest creature I've ever seen. Before leaving my sweet home to this dreadful and remote place, I don't like being at home much, mother nagging, brother arguing, everything just not right! But after leaving for months then I discovered the warmth that I've never felt before. Perhaps realization will only come after something is done.

This trip going back, I found that my mom is the best mom ever, delicate and fragile but strong, not the nagging mom anymore and I love her nagging at me. The old feeling was back instantaneously. My dad, his old-self, who will crack jokes, kinda soft but stern from his look. My brothers... How wonderful my life to have them as my family!

Before going back here I got the chance to meet my Australia friend, Weng See! LOL It's been almost 10 months since I last met her and she looks the same as usual. Me and my bro went meeting her at Jusco, although only 1 meal and few pics taken, but it's enough. Really glad to have a bunch of good friends behind, knowing that no matter how sad you feel, there's always ppl behind your back. Love that feeling!

Goodbye

2011-01-21T23:06:00.005+08:00

Night without much stars reflects the lonely life of mine, seeking for some comforts but was getting none in return. The wonderful moment will soon be over and what waiting ahead of me is a week of monotonous-cum- suffocated classes, relief is soon died out and replaced by suffering smile, deep frown will soon appear with the usual down look.

The sheer laziness thwarts me from packing my stuff? Or is it merely the reluctance of going back ? For some reasons I hate to admit that though the reluctance is obvious. Feelings, always that unfathomable and profound, hard to express but easily reveal.

The hundred or thousand times I told myself leaving is nothing but yet it's unbearable. Couldn't life do without the leaving part? As usual, I hate saying goodbye.

Real Life

2011-01-17T22:24:00.027+08:00

Frantically flipping through pages of reference books, reading through notes in the little confined room, THAT's an awful life indeed! It's the fourth day I back here and everything pleases me as even lying on my bed can be a blissful thing!

My mom was oblivious to my return well, the surprise I wanted to give her. 4 days here already! How wonderful life could be IF I wouldn't be going back to that remote and uncivilized place! I smile a lot, even laugh a lot at home that I couldn't find myself doing so at there. The smile comes naturally not forcefully. I love the way I AM now. =) So happy to see my brother now.

This is ME =)

Saturday I went out with a bunch of old friends!

*Vivian, Stella, Zac Zack and Sin Teng

Okay. SO let me introduce you all the first four. We can see that the 3 girls with me are TRIGO! WOW!!! Ha Well I'm honored to have the chance to take photo with them. They are my best friends from Primary school. 3 which from the same class I was! SO many years but our friendship still the same. This is what amaze me most.

I hate those who are so selfish and arrogant. And I met a lot of people and am prepared to meet a lot more of people with nasty attitude but never mind, i'm happy with these old friends I've. They bring out my happiness and Being with them, I feel comfortable, relaxed and well, happy.

*KS, Woon Sin, Pinkee and Jing Ni

I love my friends. As I say that, I mean the true friends, the one that will be sincere to you, not faking innocent or coming to you only when you're useful to them. Thanks you guys for bringing joyous and happiness to my life. I really

happy to have you all to be my friends and I am proud to be you all friends too!

I love all the pic taken above and below esp the one I've taken with Woon Sin and Stella. Ha Quite nice the lighting. I really miss you all and gonna miss you all as soon as I going back the IMPRISONMENT. Ha But the memory will last forever I guess. Those pictures are the prove of our life. We are friends.

Let's say YEAH together!

To 1023, Sorry for the late reply but you are one of the great friends of mine as I really love being with you, You are a smart girl. Ha LOL. I remember always arguing with you but it's really fun! And I can really get along well with you, love the way you are now. Although quite noisy but interesting! Ha Don't get all excited after reading this! Ha Enjoy the life before when we squabbled and argued.

MUET

2011-01-12T20:12:00.004+08:00

Depressed

Tomorrow last paper and I'll be going home, leaving this dreadful, enclosed and remote place once again for a week holiday. Currently sitting in my own room and reading through Econ, listening to Taylor's songs while typing my blog here.

SO wanna be back by now, be back to my lovely home. 'Home sweet Home'. Extricate myself from the heavy burden and stress that I'm now carrying and to be back to my own space, being nicely taken care of. That's IMPOSSIBLE I know but sometimes I'll always immerse myself in my own reverie, wondering the time back before I came here.

MUET out days ago and I quite satisfied with my result. The exhilaration was unexpected. What should I say? Happy I guess. No words can describe my feeling. I got Band 5 for my MUET and am waiting for my result slip so that I can prove myself worthy of that result and not by pure luck I got that. It's really hurt sometimes to hear ppl commenting about other's achievements when they are not capable in doing so, this is the so-called jealousy I guess. I don't expect ppl to be all be good and kind but neither do I expect ppl to be that mean.

An early wish to my mom for tomorrow is her birthday, I wish that I can go back now and celebrate with her. No time to elaborate here maybe after that I'll detail it on how am I gonna surprise my mom this Friday xD

2011

2011-01-01T09:11:00.008+08:00

Chalk it up to experience. This is what I will do for this whole new year. Happy New Year to all. I couldn't feel the air of this event, I feel reluctant to admit that It's another year and I just celebrated here in Perlis. Trigger by the nostalgic feeling that , I feel homesick and want to go back so much.

Christmas here, New Year here, even my Birthday will be here! Unwittingly, the date turned 2011 yesterday, the idea of another new year couldn't quite fit my mind. The azure blue sky looks unblemished ever, the day just the same. Merry Christmas to you all.

I wish I could have a blast for this year. The days before have ended, officially ended. Real friends are hard to find but I need only a few. Thanks to those friend that accompanied me for the year 2010, esp Pek Yan! Appreciate you as a good friend of mine. And thanks to my family for morally and financially supporting me for 18 years. I'll be the one to make you proud, Thank you MOM and DAD. I love you all.

Winter Solstice Festival

2010-12-22T17:20:00.003+08:00

Exacerbate the wound even further, though we know it's detrimental to us but yet ignorance fools us, making us again and again drop into the abyss that couldn't be saved. Always, we end up all alone.

Happy Winter Solstice to all my friends. Engulfed by the utter quietness of this event, I couldn't feel the usual atmosphere that I sure will get from being at home. The day is cold and the people here are even colder. I miss being home.

Imperious tone has indeed infuriated me, trying my best to cope with the problem but the invisible distance has slowly crept between us. I don't usually irritate but tampered by the naughty distance and your demanding action, I at last succumbed to my temper. I'm sorry but I feel sorry for myself too.

Disorientated from the need to decide my future. 8 courses finally out. I need acknowledgement from the others to prove myself worthy for the courses I chose. Do I manage to take on the ramifications and consequences? Could I? I dunno

At last, I wish all have a Happy Winter Solstice.

Meteors

2010-12-15T21:07:00.004+08:00

The calm feeling was back days ago. I found that we shouldn't treat everything with perfect serenity and seriousness. It'd have been a disaster, even a catastrophe. We all stick to our old and eccentirc thought about life, Life shouldn't be that pathetic.

I love what my friend told me,

Friendship isn't everything. There's no eternal and everlasting friendship in our life as best friends are hard to be sought. WE'RE all GROWING UP. When we grow up, our perspective towards life and the expectation towards friends will eventually have a leap, to a higher lever. When one's couldn't achieve the level we've specified, then we'll choose to leave it out or as a simple fact, we ignore. This could be our own problem but This is life.

WE all are uniquely built for what we are bound to be, for what we are born for, for what we are living to.

Meteors beautifully grazes the sky under high speed but afterwards, there's no trace of It in our life, easily forgotten. Intrigued by the patterns of meteors showering the Earth. There's no cul-de-sac in life, just turn around and we'll see there's another way around. SO I won't be so upset anymore! NEVER EVER. Live like the meteors showering the sky. It won't be hard Is it?

SO what?

2010-12-08T23:05:00.003+08:00

DON'T EVER try anything on cheerful ppl when they are not in mood. I hate ppl who acting overconfidently, thinking that they are correct and all of us are wrong. STUPID fully describes them. Please be rational on all the things. Don't mark yourself as the center of everything. It just shows how stupid you are, how ignorant you are. SO WHAT now?

I don't reckon everyone to like me but I don't deserve that kind of attitude, EITHER! So pls behave yourself as I'm hardly the easily erupt type! LOL

SO I'm not here to scold or complaint, just plainly mention that I'm not in the mood. So better you behave rather than I being all nuts scolding u. LOL

Happy Birthday to my BROTHER!!! The youngest and cutest brother that will be going to primary school next year. It seems funny to think that you will be bringing a heavy bag with you, so big that It's bigger than half of u. I really miss u so much u know. Hopefully I can go back soon XD

Getting 5 Flat. I'm not particular pleased or what but was getting more moody after that. Now finally calmer. 5 Flat? I still dunno what to do. Maybe LIFE is just that pathetic?

SNSD

2010-11-28T16:02:00.005+08:00

The vastness of the sea with only the horizon in view was shockingly amazed me, leaving in wonder why my life couldn't get any wider than the horizon? As though life is just a game, we're all the prey that waiting to be slaughtered by the shortness of the life.

Met my friend Zi Hern in KMK as we're invited to there for the closing ceremony. I'm deeply impressed that Zi Hern was dancing SNSD Gee bravely! Ha. So funny and so cool dude!

Don't ever laugh when seeing my pic here! I'm seriously hating the teacher now! And IF u don't know, then click the previous post and read it!

Harry Potter, I still couldn't stop myself from reading as IT's brilliant! Fantastic! Charming!

Hermione, Harry, Ron, Hagrid... ... ... And all the incantations! Elude the bustled life by reading a book of Harry is indeed a brilliant choice!

Getting a bit fuss recently maybe mainly the cause is him. I really tried my best to pretend I'm keen and everything but have failed myself. Stupid! I saw his eagerness to try but I'm really disappointed and tired. Maybe this indicates the end of everything? Just be myself I think. I miss the pre-me.

Real Old HAG!

2010-11-26T00:19:00.003+08:00

Cursing, cursing and cursing! I dunno how many F-word I've said today! LOL It's really UNLUCKY and I'll be really glad to 'THANK' the teacher for pointing me out to cut my hair!!! Hell!

^@%#%@&#^*#@!*@& ARGH!!!

Shitty old hag! I've been planning to cut it this week. Just 2 more days and I'll be out to cut it! But STUPID la really! I'm really MAD! The anger unsubsidable! Sleep? It wouldn't do any good to me! Trying to calm myself down, calling Yan to calm down but it turned out that she's busy so I called Veevee up! U 2 are the only ppl I'd find to talk to.

Deciding which course to take was suffering enough, yet this stupid event made me ever more furious! What the hell! I'm 18 you know! Still playing the kind of Barber game> Shitty! Pls la! I'm legally an adult in official term! LoL

Calm Calm Calm Calm Calm Calm Calm Calm Calm

Anyway I think I'd be going to sleep now for tomorrow still have classes to go! Must be laughing the hell outta my friends when they see me! SOB ~~~

Gallantry

2010-11-22T22:02:00.007+08:00

Weariness has torn me apart, leaving me no strength to be mentally and physically fitted in this bustled lifestyle. Sigh!

Hate to be dual personality but have to be. The lust for more holidays, craving for rest! What ppl call when getting not enough sleep? 5 days aren't enough for sure!

I feel strong satisfaction on the film 'Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallow'. I found myself crying after seeing Dobby's death. His last word, was deeply touched. And this makes me simply wanna grab the book and read for whole day! Meeting Jia Wei XD.

SO here come the Penang trip again! Me and Wei Shen should definitely be proud of our bravery! We gallantly went to Kedah and Penang without any guidances ( Can map be considered as guidance?! LoL ) So much fun and I'm still overwhelming!

Is it stylish enough? Asking Yan opinion and she said this pic not really good If compared to the previous one. Ha! I really love taking photo now! XD

Happy Birthday to my classmate once again. I'm so kind to be there in Penang celebrating your 18! Happy 18 XD

The photo I and my classmate, Chew Li XD Anyone interested? Ha!

Again lecture and lecture and lecture. My life. I need a normal life!

Messy thoughts

2010-11-16T19:13:00.002+08:00

HOME. It's a strong word for me. Many going back today, leaving only 100++ students here in KMP. Desperately want to go home but nothing much I can do to make it true. Wondering why I staying here. 5 days!

The saddening fact wouldn't change albeit how much I wish it. Maybe I'll call my mom up to ease my homesickness as well as discussing some important things with my mom.

16th Nov 2010. 2 months more to go before going back and I really wish that time can actually fly for once. A lot of stuff happening that almost driving me into insanity, trying to get myself up from the black void. I called Yan. Again, I've to thank her for contributing so much time sms-ing me and even talking to me on phone. Relief could be the only word to describe after confiding in her.

1:23:57 This is the calling time I made and we'd have been talking even longer IF I didn't control myself well... From optimistic to pessimistic.

Maybe drowning myself in the world of fantasy can do it? Sleep? Impossible to sleep whole day for me. I decided to take a jog tomorrow morning. Alone. So Nice to see my bro's pic on my phone. A surge of familiarity rushes in whenever I see the pic.

Day 1. I really wanna jot down all the little incidents happen around me. Diary perhaps. Shouldn't waste anymore valuable memory lost in nowhere.

7.30pm. Windy and Icy night again, vividly darkened the surrounding, supposedly I'll be watching TV with my family by now. Funny huh?! I miss every single thing at there. Can I cry IF I wanted to? Not gonna let anything to mess up my life now!

Smile? HAHA

2010-11-12T13:07:00.009+08:00

There is always sth we unaware of behind the smiling face, the unmistakably thin veil that hard to see through but yet It's easy to dig through it. SMILE, I love smiling but hate faking a smile when I don't want to. Laughter isn't the priority of life but It makes life more livelier.

Faking a smile seems to be practicing 'widely' but from one's eyes we can see the truth.

So this is it! Later I gonna gather at the hall around 2.45pm for some events. SO here goes again me being volunteer. Reaching Perlis wasn't that happy. For 2 days before I was still sick. Flu and stomachache that made me almost fainted and vomited. Oh my! I so dyingly wanna go back as these sicknesses trigger the virus of homesickness in my body. Esp seeing my picture taken with my bro! SO SO SO SWEET! I miss u my bro! The pic taken the day I going back! As the cover of my phone too! XD Cute huh? HA

I respect myself for eating nothing other than 2 ROTI CANAI in the morning, seemingly my appetite growing smaller and smaller? ( Nah, I just sick XD ).

Perlis. Couldn't find a specific word to describe my feeling now, MUET is tomorrow and I've yet done nothing for it! Good luck to myself, hopefully I can get a good band!

LOVE!

2010-11-09T09:36:00.008+08:00

我爱你你爱她她爱她她爱他
你爱我我爱他他爱他他爱她

咦?怎么这世界已经没有人相爱
怎么这世界每个人都不快乐
怎么这世界每个人都爱别人
不爱自己

~ Hebe ~

I love myself and I love my FAMILY and FRIENDS TOO XD

Couldn't believe myself that this is the last day for me to stay here and by tomorrow I'll be reaching Perlis for the new beginning of another new semester. Argh!!!

I started missing my cozy room, the comfortable bed ever, I'm gonna miss it for sure! And of course my sweet family! My mom, my dad, my brothers!

SO good to have a bunch of good friends and supportive family behind my back, giving me strength and energy. Being the eldest isn't that easy. I saw my parents hard work, backbreakingly making our life more comfortable. HOME SWEET HOME! Say cheese!!! Smile XD

My youngest brother, my dad and my mom. I love u all! Bye for this year and see you all nest year!

See you all next year! Wish me luck for my 2nd semester!

Ugly!

2010-11-08T18:35:00.007+08:00

Development. I still hardly believe that Malaysia will take a step forward after seeing that incident. Strongly and deeply embedded in my mind. Oh My! Wouldn't believe IF I didn't see IT!

Gripping strongly to that stupid belief on how well the world will soon be turning into, now I'll rather believe what I see. Greatly devastated, with disappointment that couldn't be told ( Exaggerated only. Actually I already disappointed ) how impossible it sounded before but yet I now see the truth! LOL

Walking into 7-11 with my youngest brother. I saw no one at the front there but I still walked inside. A woman came out from the storeroom and I veered around to the storeroom side to buy something for my brother. And what I saw was shocking me! Inconvenient to describe here. WHO interested please find me on Facebook or MSN!

Hopefully Malaysia still can take a leap into a developed country for the coming 2020. I can see the impossibility growing higher and higher.

Dusk is always that beautiful. People are always that ugly. Being delusional wouldn't make the life more perfect the way you want. It's always, in the end- Just an illusion. Realize that imperfection lurks everywhere. This is reality!

Semester break.

2010-11-07T12:15:00.006+08:00

Disorientated and disconcerted. Life would be a little more beyond reproach IF we stay optimistic the way we are now. Ignoring the heavy burden with a smirk, embracing the life of eternal freedom. Life would be much better without work and studies.

Haunted by the thought of going back to the life there, many start packing up themselves for another journey of life. SO to my dear matrik friends who are going back tomorrow, enjoy the last night u'll have with ur family or whoever u wanna be with for the last moment. And set off for another semester from today.

Happy Deepavali to all, having to celebrate Deepavali with friends was fantastic! Exuberantly taking pics and eating home-made delicacies by Trishan's mom, rather delighted. Spending hours in her house, chatting about the life we have recently.

Hmm. My holiday is coming to the end soon. 2 days left to be back again to KMP. I love my friends here, everything here. Sunday afternoon with Battlefield playing on. Sounds good for Sunday.

230 pics when hanging out with Stella they all, We all so crazy taking photo that we totally oblivious to the number of photos taken, enjoying the moment we have, seemingly we'd have to meet after ending our 2nd semester.

Taking photo with 2 of my ex-workers during our gathering in McD, I really did miss u guys, so much! There's so much to remember, the laughter we have once before in every class, the noise we made that obviously can devastate the whole school, the craps and jokes we made that sound stupid and funny.

Feverish enthusiasm. Meeting my primary school friends. Feeling awkward but turning out to be chit-chatting out loud. It's so familiar, everything, everyone. With a mild push and everything just feel normal again.

The first day began with steamboat and the celebration of Yuru's Birthday. Total 23 ppl in here. I met Si Jing, who I've missed meeting her for until now! Ha. So long I never sit down and enjoy the steamboat.

And yes! Life is infuriating in its own way but life can be real fun after all. Fun because of having a bunch of supportive friends behind u, Ur lovely parents and brothers. Family. I started to realize the importance of it. Reading 'The Forbidden Game' indeed made me on the edge of tears. The long and everlasting friendship is what I longing for. Bye all and meet u guys next semester break!

Havoc

2010-11-04T02:33:00.003+08:00

Well Well Well...

It's Thursday again and I wouldn't dare to think of the approaching day of going back to KMP. Monotonous ever the life there, relaxation wouldn't find its way to my side, as if there's a curse that would restrain me from getting myself relax. LOL. I hate the life there but love it too! What a complicated feeling after all?

A spate of incidents happened recently. Thousands of people fleet from their homeland. Havoc's happening that It's already caused 3 deaths in Kedah. First the unprecedented hurricane invaded our country, leaving dreadful images that etched deeply in our mind. Followed by the non-stop rain, pouring mercilessly on the northern region and eventually flooding that area.

Going back to KMP? LOL

Tiara Beach Resort

2010-11-01T16:32:00.010+08:00

One should treasure anything they have, time in particular. Finals have finally ended with papers and books were all burned down due to their eagerness to destroy it, perhaps the hatred they have towards those subs? I dunno. I was in no hurry to pack my stuff. All were dancing and jumping out of happiness as they'd be on their way home soon.

But I was packing formals and shoes into my luggage, going to a camp organised by KMM's PRD. Dunno why I was selected but going anywhere, mainly because of my lovely brother! Ha. Gathering in front of the library while trying to calm my adrenaline down. 3pm. Feeling light-headed heading to P. Dickson! Gonna have FUN soon! Wow!

So here we go. Spending a night first in KMPk. The college is humongous? Immense? Huge? It's relatively larger in size compared to ours, even the toilet!

8am. We all headed to the south, hoping earnestly that our trip could be ended as soon as possible as we're all sick of sitting on the bus. We finally arrived at the beach side. Due to our early arrival, we're given time to stop by the well-known beach side.

Ppl were all enjoying the coolness of the water. Refreshing maybe? But we only have time to snap a few pics. A surge of adrenaline rushed in again, urging me to embrace the sea. Gaining back my composure as IF I really would jump into it, we all walked away from the beach and into the gallery of souvenirs-buying-stalls.

Leaving the beach side with one last glimpse and going to Tiara Beach Resort for registration of the camp.

TIARA BEACH RESORT. The name of it glamorously attracted me. It's beautiful in a way that I won't be thinking having a camp here. The first day went through without much fun. Only we were delegated into different groups and have to spend 2 nights with different matrik students! The room was really out of my expectation! Ha. Only by my definition I think. I slept with a Pahang guy in a Queen size bed. I was fine with that because he's being all nice and polite, treating me with perfect courtesy. Hope I was nice to him too.

2nd day of the camp set off with aerobics. SO after that we all have to be in our respective groups, going to have what LDK sessions. Seriously the LDK was bored the hell outta ma. I was being silent and quiet, kind of like almost drifting to sleep and all my group-mates were asking me to talk, even teacher! Same goes to my dear bro, Pei Ee. Maybe due to tiredness? ha.

Having my lunch with Hema, my sis and my bro was great, although the food looked normal to me, but it's great spending my lunch time talking to my sis and bro. Ha.

Get prepared! We're going down the SEA! Literally I mean, just swimming pool la. LoL. Playing a few games in the water and I was exhausted! Man! I need rest seriously! ha. The night was excruciating tiring after having fun cause we've to play an indoor game which I dunno what the hell was going on at all. Oh! Really til now I still have no sense about what we're playing that day. Ha

We get to know a lot of friends! LoL. We're just like long-lost friends, taking photos like lunatics wandering around the resort. Ha. I wouldn't regret coming here but was relief and happy to come here after all. It's a great chance to meet friends from different areas, Malacca the most!

The last day we all forced to wear formal clothes. I mean it's because of the closing ceremony. Hours to go before going back my home! After the ceremony, we all took a few more photos before leaving.

Sth is wrong with me? I really love this camp and would be happy to stay for more. We'd treasure every experience we have so we never regret. I miss the day we all going crazy in this camp. I miss the water. I miss the monotonous and boring speech given although it's torturing me to have even 1 session of it! But I miss the fun we have.

Specially thanks to my dear friends especially my sis and bro. I miss the day we 3 together, chatting non-stop and almost anything. It's MEMORIES. And I'm gonna put it in my mind, keep it forever and ever. Irrevocableness. Why I suddenly so sentimental? Nice to meet you all ya! Happy holidays!

Exam week

2010-10-22T13:03:00.003+08:00

Day upon day of deprived sleep tired me out.

After one week of examination,

I'm gonna have a restful day! Whole afternoon! (Except doing laundry. Spoiler! Ha)

SO, Let's me fill you guys in what I've been up to this few days.

English

The first day began with English be the lead.

Essay writing though, I did nothing in particular to revise English Paper.

The extended writing- Education is not all about getting straight A's but curricular activities.

Sth like that I remember, My time management real suck!

And I don't like Argumentative writing! It's suck the whole way down but I managed to finish it.

Really. I dunno what I wrote, a bit out I think,

Hope the whole thing wouldn't mark down my whole English result! Haiz

Accounts

The day I dreaded of.

Yup! I scared every sub I took. Ha. But what to do?

SO happy that I got my ans balance! Ha. What a wonderful day!

Maths

Doomed? Nope I think.

It looked damn simple but I did it like hell.

Couldn't even finish my paper! 9 marks gone.

* Already gone, my 9 marks are gone* LoL

English Paper 1

LoL! Fantastic! The vocabulary used! It's damn damn nice!

Really love the story but what the hell only one story? The others are all lame factual type!

I dunno. Quite worried! Hope I got all A! English INCLUDED Pls!

Business

LoL. No time to finish and this is the sub that made me so desperate.

I'm not having enough sleep due to this sub!

Tiring the hell outta me and I was half sleeping half doing it! LOL

Luckily was able to finish! I wanna scream out loud till my lungs burst! So happy ya know!

Next Tues last paper! Ha

And here's some weird phenomena,

Too stress perhaps? Or It's too happy?

Couldn't even cover their excitement?

Students here all burned their book after each exam.

I mean It's seriously polluted the air! ( Not that I'm a environmental-crazy-lover, but I do love Her! )

The air pervaded with smoky smell. LoL Kinda suffocating.

AND LAST! I WISH ALL MY FRIEND GET 4 FLAT! ME INCLUDED FOR SURE! XD

Adult content! ( For those who are above 18 )

2010-10-16T20:47:00.007+08:00

English / 华语

This page is all in English. Please proceed to next page to get the Chinese Version.

Thank you for your cooperation!

Acknowledgment:

Thank you everyone for reading this post.

This post is specially for my dear friend.

She's celebrating her 18th B'day!

Content:

Since many overage, so this post is strictly forbidden for those who are under 18.

Please be kindly turn off this webpage when seeing this.

18 SX, 18 PG and 18 PL

PAGE 1

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Can't recognize?

Then you are underage~

Please be leaving now!

If not, there's consequences that you couldn't think of.

Can SEE?

It proves that you're above 18!

Congrats! You're officially legal to enter this webpage.

PAGE 2

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Seeing it?

Okay! You're 18!

Because!

You see yellow!!! ( COLD ~~~ )

ASSUME IT'S YELLOW CAUSE I DUNNO WHY THE HELL THE COLOR CAN'T SHOW HERE! ARGH!!!

PAGE 3

Okay la! This is the thing I wanna say here,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ya! To my dear Friend!

This is specially for you! And for Yan Also.

Since I gave her nothing!

Hahaha..

Today sure you cried a lot!

I so desperate wanna leave here and go Kampar to celebrate with you!

Argh! But I can't! I couldn't!

What the?

But since It's your B'day!

And I wanna release my tension.

SO I'm doing this post to you!

Don't cry again ya! Haha!!!

Happy Birthday!!!

( Anyone? Tissue paper please! Ha )

Okie! It's time! Oh ya! O much I talk but never tell you all who I'm wishing this to. Ha

SURE ENOUGH!

It's the one,

Who 16th Oct celebrate her B'day,

A girl ( Or WOman? Ha )

VEEVEE

KUEH VI VIEN

Today MAIN Character! WA SEH!

Look like It's the only photo we took nia.

But NEVER mind geh!

Happy Birthday!

( Red nice! Haha Luck it means! )

Know why I'm writing this?!

YOU ARE 18! LEGAL! Ha

For Chinese Version,

Please proceed to next page.

PAGE 4

Sorry due to time management,

The Chinese version has been officially deleted.

Mixed feelings

2010-10-15T20:55:00.004+08:00

Overwhelming!

Speaking to my little naughty brother and my dearest mom,

feeling weirdly familiar and comfortable,

I miss my home!

"Shouldn't spend all your time on books"

"Should be seeing the greenery view after revising"

Although it's just a few advices, but I feel real sweet and happy.

Relief!

My Muet Speaking test over a few days ago,

which I feel not really good at all.

Done my revision (Accounting)! Hooray!

Not entirely but almost! Better than nothing right? Ha

Frustrations? Ha.

I've been feeling out for these few days,

Trust? I started to be a non-believer,

Believe in no one other than my family,

This is the moral value of every story.

Facing you, but hardly can I speak to you.

Maybe I'm wrong about what's happening to you,

But It's all over, I really don't want any disturbances.

Disappointment wrote all over my face.

Friend? UNbelievable (Certain la. Ha Not you for sure Yan! Ha)

Ha. Nothing. just too stress here so I wrote some stupid stuff.

Excited!

It's real soothing speaking to my mom,

I feel like wanna rush back to JB,

To live the life I once before lived.

Nervous!

Finals! Argh!

2 more days to go before my finals begins!

Ishh!!! This maybe the last blog before my finals.

SO see you all after my finals!

And wish me all the best! 4 Flat!!

VERY IMPORTANT HERE!!!

To my dearest friend Veevee~~~

Happy Birthday!!!

Wish you all the best!!!

Distance

2010-10-14T07:13:00.004+08:00

喜欢坐在门外栏杆上

眺望着远方的感觉。

也许是寂寞难耐？

或是思亲缘故？

距离，

突然觉得距离这种东西好抽象，

可能是年少无知。

总觉得亲情和友谊，

父母始终都是不离不弃的那方，

以前总觉得父母唠叨，

但现在却渴望被唠叨的滋味，

友情？总让我不明。

还是亲情好了。

有种莫名的无奈，

已经很尽力了，

谁都会犯错吧，

就当作是一个教训吧。

哀莫大于心死。

现在什么都好了，

什么都看开了，

什么都结束了。

一切尽在不言中，

静静的度过，

平凡不过的生活。

又想坐在门外的栏杆上了，

想着家的感觉，

是多么的振奋人心。

Night

2010-10-11T19:18:00.003+08:00

Night,

How beautiful could it be?

How evil could it be?

Looking up at the night,

It's that usual but quieter a lot,

It's that normal but calmer a lot,

There's a moment I wanted to let go, but couldn't.

Friend? Funny huh? Truly What's it?

I love being alone, sitting on the balcony.

Pondering about the reality.

Friend? Ha.

There's many,

But would one slow down when something happens?

Would one be lending a hand to you when you suffer?

Would one share your secrets and without failing to keep it?

Would one staying loyal to you when no one believes you?

Wind blushed my face lightly,

feeling quite calm mentally but there's chaos someway down inside my heart.

Humans are unpredictable, emotional, cruel, callous by the way they wanted to be.

Talking to Yan just now,

Really happy and relief I still have someone to to talk to,

I think It's friendship, eternally and irrevocably marked us as friends.

We crapped a lot, We laughed a lot, We talked a lot,

It's soothing.

Will there still be one to talk to after years?

Memories,

There's no way I can go back.

Recalling, Remembering.

It's so wonderful sitting alone, thinking about the impossibilities,

Being honest to myself,

there's so much to talk, but silence seems like the best antidote,

I love silence.

Already Gone,

I'm already gone, I'm already gone,

There's no moving on,

So I'm already gone.

There's a time I wanted just to be a kid forever,

To shrug off the heavy burden,

To be that happy, that cheerful,

That truthful.

To be taken care of, to be loved.

Speaking

2010-10-10T14:29:00.003+08:00

I'm writing this blog in order to help me relaxing my mind,

As tomorrow is my turn to speak ( MUET speaking test )

I'm seriously worrying about the test tomorrow.

Points couldn't pour out like normally do,

Speaking stuck here and there, ( Can't speak fluently )

Finding myself stop in the halfway,

and etc.

Dying to make myself calm,

So I opted to not staying still,

Writing blog is the best way to ease my tension I think + listening to songs.

I really really hope tomorrow I can speak smoothly without any troubles.

Please, Nervousness, I'm begging you to walk away just for tomorrow.

Concentration zero now.

I wanna study for my finals but couldn't.

Maybe out of nervousness?

I dunno.

It seems like the only stuff that makes me preoccupied.

Be confident! Keep my mind clear, for EVERYTHING!

I want to do my best!!! Argh!!!

VolunteerS!

2010-10-03T12:53:00.010+08:00

2 days of continuous cycling has worn me out!

But It's indeed fun and interesting job to reject! Ha

First day came, Friday!

5 of us were selected to bring all the other matrik students to the registration part,

Cycling was what we mostly did during the time.

Our job started at 9am.

I was first assigned to be with She Mei and Wani in the Bilik Felo

To welcome those comers and bring them to their allocated rooms.

But unfortunately, only 2 matrik came in the morning part.

Later I and She Mei were both sitting beside the guard house,

waiting for the arrival of the invited guests,

BUT Damn IT! They were all being late!

At last all managed to arrive before 7pm.

Me did something stupid! Never notice the Teknikal Kulim was already there,

And waited for one more

hour back there at the guard house!

Saturday. 3 Oct

Why the hell again we have to go Kuliah! I was tiring like hell you know.

But It's okay! Ha

3pm we all have to gather at Foyer A to be briefed again.

So we began after dividing the area we'll be guarding on.

( At 6pm la )

Ha.
We went from station to station and took real lots of pics!

I and my daughter^^

I and my roommate

4 of us again!

From station to station!

SO we started our duty.

I and She Mei were together near the cafe there,

There's no car there, let alone showing them road.

So we tried to study but UNSUCCESSFULLY.

It's hard seh, a lot of mosquitoes!!!

The arrival of Raja Perlis jolted us fully awake,

( Not sleepy actually but boring to hell )

Ha. It's nice we can have a glimpse of Raja Perlis ( Not really see la )

And we have to rush back to our original position!

What infuriating me the most was that I and She Mei can't take a ride on The Train! Argh!!!

All my friends have the chance to sit on the moving train!

We MANAGED to rush to the train but IT'S STOPPED! LoL

So we just can take a few pics of it!

Night had fallen unexpectedly,

Cycling gangly with my Kakom marching gang!! Ha

The ululating and howling of wind ( My daughter vocab! Ha. )

It's refreshing!

ANd at last before the ceremony ended,

we all took few more pics!

I love this job!

I love the people,

I love you all!

Cute looks!?

Stress?!

Insane looks?! Ha

Free time

2010-09-29T10:40:00.003+08:00

Due to some reasons ( Most of the teacher went to take a test, I dunno what's the test la )

I'm totally free now!

LoL. But thinking about the homework,

It's really spoiling my happy free time! ( Have to finish Accounts PAST YEAR EXAM ).

Rather than doing it, I decided to write something here. ( Take a break, Have a kit kat! Ha )

Day after day, Now only left 10++ days before my finals.

Damn it! I still have a lot to read, to study!

I'm a bit worried about the whole exam-is-approaching news but I do nothing in particular!

My friend sick jor for 2 days,

Which he looked terribly unwell,

Pale, Cold, Moodiness...

He's seriously being conquered by the sickness.

I advised him to go see doctor but he refused geh,

I dunno why he so stubborn,

Ha. But he's getting well by now.

Not fully recover but partially.

I hope he can fully recover.

( Exam will be coming soon! )

Argh! Accounts!

LoL And I wanna do some revision.

I think I'll less online.

Must gain control over it.

Don't let ONLINE kill me!

No more procrastination, No more laziness, No more EXCUSES for anything beneficial!